Well today I have found something out about myself that I wasn't aware of. Just when you think you know everything there is to know about yourself someone has to tell you a quality that you didn't know you possessed.

I was told today that I was selfish.

Now usually that wouldn't bother me, but you have to consider the source. I'll tell you who the source was. It just so happened to by my babys dad, my fiance'. Well just to let you know I'm not selfish he is just a prick. Actually, I take that back he isn't a prick he is actually a spineless lazy prick. The reason he called me selfish was because I had $8 to put gas in my car so my mother could use in Monday to take my grandmother somewhere & he wanted it. Well this time I stood up for myself & said no. I never do I give him & my daughter anything that they want.

Actually, right now I only own one pair of sneakers and the soles are about to fall off, but the spineless lazy prick is walking around in brand new $86 shoes that he thought he needed to go with the other three pair of sneakers he owns. Did I say a word? Nope, the only thing I said about his new shoes were those are nice, and are they comfortable?

But remember I'm the selfish one here we can't forget that.

Then on his birthday this month he wanted to go out with his friends. We had no babysitter so one of us couldn't go or both of us was going to have to stay home. Guess who volunteers? Yep your right it was me. I stayed home and let him run the bars. Then I get on a friends myspace page & find a picture of him and a woman. They weren't side by side but rather he was standing behind her with his arms around her waist. Now do you think that I threw a fit? Nope, even though inside it is eating me alive. I just suck it up. I've come to the conclusion he is 31 years old if he is still going to keep acting like this then he is never going to grow up.

My birthday last year I spent it alone so that he could take is other daughter (by his first wife) out for ice cream. He didn't come home to 1 am and he wasn't with his daughter the whole time. Actually, to this day I don't know where he was.

Even though I do without food before they do, clothes, shoes and everything else. Because I said no one time I'm the selfish bitch.

Oh well I guess that is a name I will wear proudly.