| A Falure Played In Stereo |
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Things have calmed down since lastnight! She's gone for abit I think! So, I'm not gona write about her for now!
I have had a good morning, actualy. My friend is a true friend, he gave me a blow job this morning! So, I was very happy this morning. Then I came on here and read some comments and some posts. I listened to some podcasts aswell some are realy good, some I've never heard of before.
I've been thinking about the 'gay mafia'. Does it realy exist, in the UK? How can I join? I can do lots of realy bad things when paid the right amount of money.
Yes I am abit of a girl sometimes, but I'm strong in other ways. It may not exist, so, should I start it up? I don't class myself as gay, I'm oversexual.
Well, waiting to chat to my girl in thailand, where is she? She's a 'ladyboy' and despite what you may think. I will marry her. I think about her all the time now. She knows nothing about my life here in the UK. She's a good girl, she's got a good job. She doesn't know about me and being a 'prostitute'. I told her many lines, one day I'll tell her the truth. I'm scared that she might not like the truth! AHHHHGGG!!!!
Why can't I just tell the fucking truth? Why is it so fucking hard to be myself? Why do I fear people knowing me? I tell the truth here, but I edit the truth. I can't tell you my name or where I live!
I'm sick and tired of always lying, I lie to everyone! No one knows the whole truth! Why do I feel they should know the whole truth? Sometimes I'm honest, but people think I'm joking! I have friends that would not believe what happened to me this morning if you told them. Even my friend this morning doesn't know I'm a male escort! Shit the more I think about it the more I know I have to get out.
Will I be this way for ever? Should I come clean before I leave?
Where the fuck is Jerry fucking Springer?
Yes there is alot of colour, I think its supposed to be artistic!
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Posted by yadokta on 2008-04-18 08:37:33 | Rating: | Views: 98
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