| View Blog
|
|
|
|
I have been home a month and I am ready for school to start again! Maybe I won't be coming back next year. I didn't even want to come back this year, but with no job for a year that makes me with no money and I really cannot afford anything on nothing so that left me living at home:( I cannot take it anymore! I am so sick of all the bullcrap between my sister and my mom! It is not necessary...I've been home for a month and since then 24/7 fighting constantly between them.
I do not have to do anything and my mom takes out all her frustration and anger out on me for reasons I will never understand. I've dealt with this my entire life so it is not something new, but for once I just wish they would grow up. Not be so stubborn. I realize my sister made poor choices, I probably know more about them then my parents, but that is beside the point. Parents are not suppose to tear their children down when they make mistakes, instead they are suppose to lift them up and let them learn from their mistakes. Maybe take the initative to show her how to change what she did wrong and make it right, but they should not be tearing her down. But my sister also needs to realize that she is not always right, and our parents are only doing what they think is best for her, because they love her.
Since I've been home I have seen very little lifting up and positive attitude. I've seen way too much negativity and not caring attitudes between them and everyone else. What the heck happened while I was gone!? I realize things change but right now things are changing way too fast and way too much! I cannot handle it all, my life is falling apart, not to mention the fact that me myself is falling apart from the seams.
This summer was suppose to be great. I was suppose to finally get to see my friends, get a job, go back to the church that I have missed for so long. And what happens?...both my best friends are going away on vacation basically at the same time. I'm having a fruitless job search that I am ready to just give up and do nothing all summer, my mom even told me today that just because I did this and this and this did not mean I was going to get a job, where is the hope in that?! I have high hopes for this summer, but I have a feeling living in this house much longer my hopes will all come crashing down on me. And the church that I have clung too throughout freshman year has basically fallen apart. They are letting core go left and right, they are not meeting the needs of the teens, and the community that I once knew is basically gone. Sad to see how fast things can change in such a small about of time. It's only been a year, yet so much has changed and nothing seems to be going right.
At least I have a job shadow being set up. I am really excited about that. I've been looking forward to this for awhile now, and it is finally getting set up:)I'm super excited. I get to job shadow one of my former Youth Ministers who recently moved to a different parish. I cannot wait!
If I cannot find a job, I can at least job shadow. It is better than sitting at home being the slave girl again! I am not 10 years old any more, I have a life and I want to live it. I do my share times 10! I have yet to see my sisters lift a finger to help around the house, I'm not the only daughter they have! What are they going to do when I am gone for good? Maybe then I will get a little respect and appreciation for the work I've done my entire life.
I need an escape, a way out of this place. Somewhere I can go to and be with friends, instead of sitting here alone doing chores all day. This is not the summer I was looking forward too all year! I need to make some changes around here and they start tomorrow! I've had enough of this crap I am taking a stand against this injustice!
|
|
|
|
| |
|
|
| Views: 46
Email This to a Friend 
