Posted by
Hollis
on 2008-05-01 07:46:25 |
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| yes I would keep them...It is a bond that we had...I may change them into just a necklace or something..... |
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Posted by
anotherdaze
on 2008-05-01 08:26:40 |
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Well they sound like they still mean something to her. I don't know your situation but I think they signify a life you wanted or lived, a struggle you went through, hopes you had. They could mean any number of things to her. Even just something of value.
I was married once before. I didn't want mine. I was going to save them for my daughter but while cleaning out some boxes my grand mother found them. She was helping me. She asked what I was going to do with them. I told her she could have them if she wanted them. They just really didn't have any value to me. So she took them. Now thinking about it I don't think my daughter would want them. She is now working on almost 16. Her "sperm doner" has never had anything to do with her. She knows how much support he has never paid and it makes her mad. She wants him to go to prison. And that may happen. He is that far behind. Anyway just my two cents. |
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Posted by
shemelts
on 2008-05-01 08:35:25 |
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Most women keep jewelry from past relationships because for better or worse they signify years of your life together. They carry with them memories of a more pleasant time, when perhaps she was happy. They carry a significance of your love at the time.
If my husband asked me for a divorce today, I would hang onto the jewelry he gave me. I would pass it to our children with the stories of love that went with each of them.
Divorce does not erase history. It is a beginning of a new kind of normal..but does not take away from the good memories. I hope at some time you and your wife are able to look back and see the good times, and the positive things that you brought out in each other. Even when(and I don't think its and if anymore) you move on, you will carry the effects of this relationship with you forever.
peace ;) shemelts |
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Posted by
EasyToSay
on 2008-05-01 08:49:11 |
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I'm keeping mine - in what capacity I'm not sure ... but as mentioned in an earlier blog - I CHOSE them, he did not... I paid for them with OUR Money, he didn't make any ounce of effort.
So even though they symbolise our marriage, I CHOSE THEM BY myself - for myself - wished he did it for me, but from experience he would have had NO IDEA what I liked .... just me!
.... and I'd like to give them to Miss 8 and she can choose what to do with them. |
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Posted by
prelude2it
on 2008-05-01 09:39:05 |
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Here's my story with this:
My exhusband cheated and he kept his wedding right with him on his key chain because he said he could not let it go.
For me, the day I asked for a divorce I took it off but I keep it because it is a memory of what could have been and what my life was. |
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Posted by
ColoradoDreamin
on 2008-05-01 12:07:47 |
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| Took mine to a shop that buys jewelry. The thought of having the stone anywhere near me or mounted into anything else (necklace earrings etc) didn't much appeal to me. I keep my distance from items that hold bad memories or remind me of hurtful unhappy times. I left the jewelry shop, that day, feeling lighter than I had in years and happy for the $95.00 I received for my wedding set and several other pieces of jewelry. I have never regretted my decision. I don't have children to pass things along to, and in my way of thinking the bad memories attached to something rub off on those in possession of those items. Someone in possession of a ring from an unhappy marriage would also be unhappy in love. If a new bride chose to wear wedding rings from a failed marriage her marriage would fail as well. |
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Posted by
overthehillandfaraway
on 2008-05-01 17:14:14 |
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| My first ring was the only nice piece of jewellry I had at that time, so I held on to it. Because it was remarkably tiny, it fitted my daughter when she was 14 so I gave it to her. She wore it on her middle finger for the first time going water skiing. Somehow, although it was quite tight, it came off her finger and got swept away with the tide. It all seemed rather apt and proper after that. |
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Posted by
caringadvis
on 2008-05-01 19:55:48 |
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To keep the rings is one thing, but to "wear them around her neck" is altogether different. Obviously your wife loves you and would desire to keep you near to her. This is the symbolisim behind this statement. It is an emotional gesture. Again, perhaps your wife is trying harder than you are willing to see at this time. With eyes and heart only for KP you wife really doesn't stand a chance. So may I please ask at the point of sounding rude and noisy "Why don't you just go to KP?, "Why do you just lead your wife on? Are you in fact just using her until KP is available? Is this really fair to your wife? Are these really the actions of "a gentleman"?
Caring Advise
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Posted by
Nubian
on 2008-05-02 16:49:26 |
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| I kept my engagement ring and my wedding set so I can give it to my daughters when they are old enough to wear them. |
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