My wife's favorite movie is THE WIZARD OF OZ
I like it I guess
I mean it is a colorful story that I always thought had a message that was about finding the strength that was in you.
I thought the message of the movie was that you need to look inside yourself and maybe you will find this great person you always wanted to be hiding in there.
Then again I have not watched it 3 to 4 times a year for the last 40plus years of my life like my wife.
I never saw the message of that movie being anti-tourism
The other night I was discussing the fact that one of my areas that I have grown in, that NQRW needs to grow in, and part of the journey I want to take that will be the rest of my life is more traveling. I want to see California, Montana, Alaska, etc. I can kick myself that a few years ago I had a good friend that lived in Hawaii and he would ask me constantly when was I coming...I always begged off as the wife would not go, too long a flight, too long w/o smoking, too expensive, hell of a trip "just for a beach".
Oh and there is this island continent that I seem to be very intrested in visting...hmmmmmm
Anyway, I tell NQRW this and get that she feels like Dorothy in the movie.
What did that mean?
She proceeds to tell me that the moral of that movie is that everything you need is in your own backyard.
Really????
They moved Paris, Rome, all the great art, The Grand Canyon, Sydney Opera House, The Great Wall of China, DisneyWorld and all the other great treasures of the world into my backyard?
I better get ready for a whopper of a tax assessment !
Even when I pointed this out, she said none of those places are important, all that you need is in your backyard.
If this next story is a repeat forgive me:
A few weeks ago we go to parent teacher night at school
One of my son's teachers is in the program at Princeton for her Masters. It is in my field of study.
Now I have always wanted to get my Masters degree but time and money prevented it, although the fire still is there.
I went home to look up this program and almost drooled over how much I would love to do this!!!!
I even asked the teacher, my son's, if she could see about sneaking me in one week to a class just so I can get the feel of this class. She will check.
I have BEGGED NQRW to go back and get her degree. I have warned her since our first date that not having at least a BA or BS will hurt her in the work world. She had no desire and our first real fight as a couple was about just that, her unwillingness to want to go back to school.
I know that some people thrist for knowledge and that thrist is never truly quenched. That is me.
I also know that for some, a sip is enough. And that is OK to a degree. I mean that in the sense that it takes all kinds to make a world.
But to simply say that you have stopped learning, that all you want to know you know, that the world consists of your backyard makes me want to scream!
As I said before, I had a neice that was born blind and possibly even somewhat deaf. She passed away before they could completely determine how impaired her hearing was, but she did hear some they were sure. I was all ready to try to make her "see" the world thru my eyes and my love of photography and I had hoped if she could hear that she would teach me how "not to see" and use my other senses better to enjoy the world. But we both would have learned.
Someone that impaired might easily have just decided her world was the safe one she knew, but no one that knew her was ready to let that happen.
How a healthy, young, woman could have the attitude NQRW has boggles me....or am I missing something?
Am I missing what she means? If so I am willing to learn
Posted by whiteknight on 2008-04-29 15:52:53 | Rating: n/a | Views: 142
I agree with your point of view completely on this post - I think if I lost my desire to keep "learning", I would lose my desire to "live". I also think your wife's conclusion about the meaning of the WOZ was quite a stretch. I don't think Frank Baum (I think that's his name) was trying to say that Dorothy and Aunt Em and Uncle whatshisname should not take vacations but merely that they should appreciate what they have in their own backyard.
Please don't think I am a jerk by saying this, but you and your wife do not seem to be the slightest bit compatible in some major areas. Some people are home bodies and complacement with the "status quo" and that is fine. It's obviously not you, however. That could be the root of a lot of your struggles as a couple.
Totally agree, the world definitely extends past your backyard. I would think more the moral is, home is where the heart is, but everyone needs an adventure, even a little farm girl from Kansas. :)
Get the degree, when you are 80 and have masters degree or PHD you will look back and be glad you did.
Sounds like you need a little excitement. I truly hope that you do travel. My mom's passion is travelling and she always used to take her kids all over to "experience other lives". If I can say one thing it would be to travel. The experiences change you as a person.
There are many themes when it comes to movies, novels or poetry. If you have ever participated in a university literature discussion you know there are lots of different opinions and meanings tossed about. People interpret things through the window of their attitudes, personality and experiences.
Your wife reminds me of my father-in-law. He was a man who was at peace in his home and garden. He had no desire for a day trip let alone some far away adventure. His "way" was who is was and how he lived was right for him. We all need to live our truth. My mother-in-law, on the other hand, loved travel and learning. She went many places by herself or with one of her daughters. Life is short. Sometimes we have to agree to disagree. Instead of trying to bring your wife around to your way of thinking put your energy into pursuing your dreams ... whether that be a trip or going back to school. Peace.
Everything you need to be happy is within you. If you choose to be unhappy, it can be anywhere. Your wife seems to be more pragmatic. Maybe she is living in the real world and knows the Wiz is a fake. He talks a big story, but cannot deliver.
In my experience, people who want to go places, go. There are lots of visitors to the Grand canyon who only see a big hole in the ground, and others, like Georgia O'Keefe, who spend years painting the weeds and the steer skulls she found in her own back yard on Ghost Ranch, down in the canyon. Her thirst for knowlege led her to perfect what she had in front of her. Intellectual curiousity is not defined by what you see, but by how you make use of it.
Was the Wizard a fake?
He showed them that what they were looking for was inside themselves.
He delivered what he promised, but not the way that the characters wanted it...Is the TinMan sensitive? Does the Scarecrow feel he is smart? Does the Lion have confidence and courage and Dorothy is home right?
What did he not deliver?
I didn't start to travel until I was 21. Once I started I got to see a lot of Europe in a short time. My mother sat home and wondered. She would write poetry about foreign lands but she never visited them. When we started to travel long haul she would ask us what was wrong with 'dear old Ireland' or even Scotland. Strangely, she loved to hear from my brother who, as a war correspondent, travelled the world. I never understood her reluctance as she was a very intelligent lady. Then, in her very old age, I discovered she just lacked the confidence as she felt she might not 'fit in'. She went to Spain and Portugal but felt inept at not being able to speak the language. I think your wife lacks a lot of confidence and maybe, like my mother, she pretends to like her own back yard when maybe, secretly, she would love to spread her wings and fly.
I dont think ur missing anything, I agree with you about the knowledge bit. And the backyard thing.
I think our backyard will remain just that - our backyard. The real world is out there...waiting to be discovered...
