Thoughts.com Blogs - Batman and other thoughts(2 blogs in one)

A few posts ago I talked about going out and looking at rings for KP,
or at least looking at engagement rings as alot has to happen for KP and I to get to where I am out looking with that purpose and not just looking to kill time in a fun way...
But I wanted to revist that incident because it reminded me of a feeling I had many years ago that I had again doing that "looking"
Back after college I did a Christmas season as Santa in a mall.
I loved being Santa for many reasons and some of it was sad though, like when a mother brought her severely handicapped baby to sit with Santa. I looked at this baby and he was maybe a few months old and saw how bad off he was by his appearence and the mother said he was handicapped when she put him in my lap.
I felt so bad that from what I overheard this might be this baby's ONLY Christmas and I was going to be the Santa that he had a picture with. I almost wanted to tell them to go get a picture with a better equiped, better looking, better outfitted Santa
I cried that night on my way home for that baby

But that was not the feeling I was talking about, in fact I forgot about that part until I started typing...
Anyway...
One of the parts that I liked and the feeling I had again was what I called Bruce Wayne syndrome.
After getting thru with my shift I would walk back to my changing room where usually the next guy was getting dressed. During the walk the kids would scream and yell and laugh and giggle they were SO happy to see Santa.
I would change out of the suit and take off the beard and all that and walk back out in my street clothes and kids could care less.
No laughs or cries of joy
But I also would have this feeling like I had a secret identity. I was Santa and now I could walk around like a person and no one knew!
It was fun.
I would look at kids the way I guess Batman did people. In his head must have been the idea that "Don't you know I am Batman?". But they didn't, to them his was just Bruce Wayne.

Then when I slipped off the wedding ring the other day and went engagement ring shopping for my girlfriend I could be SINGLEMAN !!!! LOL
It was fun
And just a lil additional part to this. Shopping now for this ring, even when I knew I was not really shopping was more fun than when I did it for real years ago. I was more sure that this ring was the ring I wanted to give. Just another sign that maybe I need to leave the wife.

But it is like this:

Say you find a plot of land to build a house
You get the plans and a builder and all
But while you are building that house you need to stay in the house you now own
At first it is OK. You make plans for the house you are building, you dream of what it will be like watching the big games on that TV you are going to buy to go in that den you are designing, and your wife is dreaming of the nice tile that is going in her new kitchen with the island counter.
but delays in building, delays that are no one's fault happen
You are in your house much longer than you plannned
And things in your new house start needing repair
You need to buy a new hot water heater, a new stove maybe.
You are getting sick of spending money and time and memories in that old place when you want that new place.
And you have no idea when this new house will be done, in fact it may never be done, again by no fault of anyone.
You can not sell this old house and set a date to move out until you are sure the new house is there and ready.
Because if you do, you will risk sleeping on the street with no house, even though frankly, you have grown tired of this old house and the wallpaper you liked once now looks tacky and that fireplace was never really the one you wanted, etc
You might try to replace the wallpaper, you will be here a bit longer than you thought so maybe you can paint that room.
But you will not spend the time an energy to redo the
fireplace or expand the bathroom, only to move out.
And you are really hating the idea that you have to spend another year of Christmas' and birthdays and summer fun in this place when you had been your heart set on them in that new place you wanted so bad.
And the bad part is that you can not do anything to make the house get done faster
The builder is doing all he can, it is not his fault
It is just"things" keeping the house unfinished

All I want to say to end this blog that went far far far off track is that I hope my hause get done soon so that next time I go shopping for a "house key" it is for real and not just a fun way to dream of the day when I get to carry my wife and my life over that threshold into a new and happir life that I know it will be