so its been a rough few days at work. ive been dealing with some high energetic physical teens. i swear im there to be a personal punching bag. for example during staff meeting we were pretty much told tomanage this one teen hat has awful boundaries any way possible. this means shyra is one of two staff that gets to be both the bad guy cool staff and the punching bag. we tried setting limits... unfortunately i can only get punched so many times before i put hands on. its not your typical hands on case. this is a client who will hit us because she wants us to hold her, she will hit us because she feels that its theonly way tp get attention. her parents suck and refused to let her  home. she has given up on herself... hence the beahciors. to her im just a comic relief. well today we ended up in like 4 restrainst and a few transports with this client... yeah fun right ... NOT. at one point she kicked in a window, threw all of her shit around ripped off all of the posters from the walls triend to kick in a fire place and tried to stick metal objects in the electrical outlet... I can hold this kid by herself but she is not meant to be held by one staff. unforunately we had another restraint happening as well as a floor full on NFD clients. pretty much it was a no win situation. i took a beating pretty much. i love my job i really do just not this part, im not a fan of working with teens who act out because they feel like it. unfortunately we tend to baby them and push them to be this way. some truly need a good ass kicking. now i have had the worst migraines... even my boss could tell i was  in pain. so after that i pretended to be ok and i think i did well no one questioned it. hidden pain = success. so my organization is opening a new campus in a lil over a year from now. in this we will put four residenials a daycenter and outpatient programs all in one building... this is good so when we are in crisis there will be more staff to help. im soo excited about this. plus a space with quiet rooms. oh man i cant wait we need that no more running in circles after kids. im soo tired i should go to bed but i wanna hold up as long as possible since i have top work the overnight tomorrow. its going to suck ass majorly. hopefully i will have internet access and can write more dumb shit allllll night. thats if my cleints follow directions and settle. ... so im meeting with my boss afte my overnight, oh i cant wait im gonna go off about thebitch who showed up drunk. shit we fire peeps for sleeping why not alcohol. my goal is to get her fired, i will feel better then.

oh and i havent seen becca in a while, we talk less and less, really she works and goes to school way to much. girl needs a break. she is such a hard worker and continues to try and find ways to give back in the community. i wish her luck. she puts up with soo much but really knows how to advocate for herself. she is sweet ... i like aher :) i wish i could talk with her more. knowing my luck im heading way too fast and she will just stop talking to me and ignore me at all cost. i really like her i hope she can reciprocate. id be wicked dissapointed if she drops me like a hot potato. but whatever happens happens i guess. im aweful at reading her. she has such a huge wall up.  i dont care for this wall but i will respect it and wait if thats the case. i mean just being who she is and what she is about she is a person worth waiting for, even if its not for me ya know. only a fool would really want to hurt her and ignore her beauty .