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Tiffanie,
I want to tell you about my day, but on the phone I just cant say it. I went to an old "friend" today, I wanted so bad to get high, to just have a few minutes of no pain. I sat up all night praying you would call. I woke up crying without you. I feel so weak, so lost, so hurt ,and I thought if I could just get high I would feel better at least for awhile. He didn't have anything, and he couldn't find it anywhere, devine internention I guess, but baby I still want to do it! I'm so weak, I should be stronger than this. I thought I was. Tiffanie, I will make it better, but I need you with me to do it. God ,darlin', I thought we could walk through fire! I messed up, I know it, and I cant stand that I hurt you, but I know now how much pain you felt, cause I feel it myself. Just, hell I dont know, just ............ That song is playing now, Things a momma dont know, I am that guy, I sold you those dreams, but no more dreams Tiff, I'll make it real, just watch me. |
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Posted by tonyrayhutchison on 2008-04-18 22:46:03 | Rating: | Views: 94
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tony please don't do it, if you need me you can call me anytime night or day, i can't let you ruin everything you have worked so hard for, please please for me? stay clean honey please xxxxxxx
i love you honey xxx
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Posted by missmarie
on 2008-04-19 09:08:34
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Besides that, if you fall off the wagon she may never take you back, stay clean for her, but most of all do it for the boy, keep hold of all the things you hold dear and remember how much they need the new Tony, the strong Tony, the Tony with a future and new career ahead of him, please hold on to anything that keeps you clean, one day at a time xxxxxx
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Posted by missmarie
on 2008-04-19 09:10:57
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Also, look how far you have come, you have your independance you have dreams of a new life, you have your boy who needs you and will always need you, you have become such a strong person Tony, and you did that before new years eve and you can still stay strong, you just have to keep fighting those demons, i'm sorry i wasnt here last night for you, i will be here tonight if you need me x
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Posted by missmarie
on 2008-04-19 09:14:30
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it`s good
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Posted by poet
on 2008-04-19 15:34:53
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A guy that works for me falls off the wagon every 2 years or so. He's 45. Wife left him in the 90's. He lost it again this fall and it wasn't pretty. had to fire him. Took him back in January and he's living in a facility. Watching him...I see the difficulty and the destruction of a life. Keep it clean if you can.....
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Posted by Nutshell
on 2008-04-19 21:55:51
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