Do you ever have one of those dreams where your running and running, trying to get somewhere, get something that keeps moving just outside your grasp? Dealing with him feels like one of those dreams. I think I might be in love, although really, how in love can you be without dating the guy, without kissing him or telling him your secrets, learning things about him that no one else knows? It's just that I can't make him feel the same, I can't make him love me. Whenever I talk to him it's like the words won't come out right, I can't make myself be charming or witty or flirty. I end up looking like a fool, talking about something mundane, like our classes or, god forbid, the weather, when I really want to ask him about his family, what makes him laugh, what kind of girl he's really looking for. I want to get to know him but I don't know how. Seeing him at a distance I feel confidant that I could walk right up and say something to really make him take notice, but that confidence melts away when I get near him. I start grasping for the the right thing to say, anything to make him see me as a beautiful person, a potential girlfriend. I know those words are so close, I keep reaching for them and reaching for them, but I can never hold on.