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| My life, My Story, The Adult Years ...Part Six
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Its no use, got to finish. Got to keep active.
So I guess after my wife of one week told me why she married me, my hopes for a long and happy marriage were somewhat dashed. Also around this time I decided to give up the band stuff because I knew that our band was never going to have a major recording contract and I had to put food on the table.
I got a job in the "brewery industry" and after 6 months I become full time. It had good wages and top of the line benefits. About six months after I became full time, I left work early. I had been feeling rather ill all morning and thought home and bed is where I should be. I got home and walked in to a family friend " doing " my wife. For a split second all three of us had a shocked look on our faces. I went up to him, grabbed him by the throat, lifted him 6 inches in the air, pulled back my fist ready to " cave in " his face when I heard my son stirring in the other room. I remembered that he too had a young child and in spite of what I was feeling, I couldn't deny his child, her dad. I threw him out into the hall, naked, followed by his clothes. I told my wife to take my son and go to her parents.
While she was gone, I packed up everything I could in the car and left and went to my aunts. I never went back. I took a week off work, got myself a little place of my own. My wife tried to contact me but I told my employer that any calls from her were unwelcome. They finally had to tell her to stop calling my workplace or they would take legal action. She also packed up her stuff and moved closer to here parents.
I had no contact with her whats so ever. I had nothing to offer my son. I was on my own, no money, starting all over again. His mother had a good support system. She had her family and friends, her job. In my mind I felt at the time that if I couldn't be my son's full time father then I hoped he would be able to go through his life doing good for himself as I did.
That was a big mistake and if the hands of time could be turned back, I would undo that choice I made .
I should have maintained contact with him, let him know I was there. But even though I did care and love him, I removed myself from his life. Thats was a real big mistake and one that even today, I deeply regret.
That choice I made came back to haunt me years later as you will soon learn.
to be continued......
so until I blog at you again,
take care of yourselves,
and each other.......templar
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| Blog Comments
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I believe you did the right thing. regrets are always going to bite us later, and I am praying that things have worked out for the best...
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Posted by Hollis
on 2008-04-04 22:35:47
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oh honey, i really hope that something good happens soon, and i agree, we have had a similar situation in our family where, for the sake of his children a man has left them alone for similar reasons and a few others, it is a long story but i do think that there are occasions where it is the right choice, and we have to hope that the children understand when they are grown x
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Posted by missmarie
on 2008-04-06 19:35:19
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Your self-esteem must have hit rock bottom templar, how much more personal can it get? You made a decision at the time that was right for you in that moment and for that you have to honour yourself. And hindsight is such a wonderful thing.. if only we could tap in to it earlier on the road. xx
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Posted by Merlyn
on 2008-04-08 09:50:20
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| Views: 78
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