I'm not perfect, far from it. I'm inconsiderate at times, too considerate at others. I rarely put myself first, but sometimes you just have to. I should of told him i needed time to myself, to... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-01 07:38:13
Average Rating: | Views: 77 | # Comments: 1 | Tags:

Life is far from easy, nor do i expect it to be.  I do have some hope that it'll get easier somewhere along the way, but for now turmoil seems to suit it best. I'm flying high one minute and... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-08 15:00:31
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 65 | # Comments: 2 | Tags:

We're getting together 3 weeks! , for a romantic few days alone, hotel jacuzzi suite.  I so excited but i'm dreading it as well.  I love him with all my heart, but i just don't know... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-08 17:48:23
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 78 | # Comments: 0 | Tags:

A Tear A fallen tear, streaks down her cheek Days gone by, without a word Where will it end, where did it start All she knows, he’s in her heart... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-08 20:16:44
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 171 | # Comments: 3 | Tags:

I do love writing, its a good form of therapy for me. I can't change who i am on the broad scale, i'll always just be me, but i think i've changed alot in the last year. I've probably had... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-09 12:13:19
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 45 | # Comments: 0 | Tags:

Yesterday was a good day, i feel like i worked out alot of my anger? heartache?  When on the computer, we always talk through yahoo, and i was in a bad state yesterday morning, i sent him a... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-11 13:11:31
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 65 | # Comments: 0 | Tags:

I had a very busy day today. Which was nice, because it let me just not "think". I worked at a new store today, the one i did my training at, and will probably be taking over come the new... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-12 21:39:33
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 77 | # Comments: 1 | Tags:

Tonight was especially hard.  Fuck the last 6 months have been hard but i just haven't felt it like i have the last month or so.  The last week.  Why do i bother, i know why, but... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-15 03:40:30
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 48 | # Comments: 0 | Tags:

So he called me yesterday, to see how i was.  It felt good despite all my tears, because it was nice to know he still cares. Cares, not loves, because i know he loves me, thats one thing i... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-16 13:24:36
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 92 | # Comments: 0 | Tags:

I can't sleep. Tried off and on now for a few hours and finally decided to stop tossing and turning.  Maybe its for the best, as the next 2 weeks are going to be very busy.  I work each... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-17 02:47:58
Average Rating: | Views: 61 | # Comments: 2 | Tags:

Well, the work 2 weeks have begun.  I'm off tomorrow,  because J felt sorry i wasn't gonna have a day off for 2 weeks, so she said don't bother coming in tues.  There's alot of... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-18 01:47:38
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 52 | # Comments: 0 | Tags:

Seriously, what the hell is wrong with men, they never freakin listen!  Doesn't matter if i say, let me know how your doing, i get no answer . I invite a friend for xmas supper as his plan... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-18 23:36:04
Average Rating: | Views: 79 | # Comments: 2 | Tags:

Been busy doing chores for awhile and thought i'd stop and take a break, for mind, body and spirit.   Listening to some oldies but goodies, though oldies for me are the 80's and a few... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-20 20:37:42
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 98 | # Comments: 0 | Tags:

Working and standing/running around for 12 hours ain't fun!  But at least it keeps me from thinking. Sorta. It is now Dec 22, and he's supposed to be here on the 28th, wonder if he'll... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-22 12:46:10
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 65 | # Comments: 0 | Tags:

It was a long and quiet night.  I don't mind working the midnights, it gives me a chance to just breathe and take it easy, instead of being rushed off my feet when i do morning/afternoon.... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-23 09:31:38
Average Rating: | Views: 60 | # Comments: 1 | Tags:

I really don't enjoy the holidays, i think i said that in a previous post.  This year i was actually looking forward to it, more then i ever had.   God what a freakin... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-26 17:24:51
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 72 | # Comments: 0 | Tags:

Well we talked, and he isn't coming.   I never thought it could hurt this much.  Guess i was wrong on yet another thing.   I had a chat with my g/ the other day, she told... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-27 13:05:43
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 74 | # Comments: 0 | Tags:

There's quite a bit i wanted to write about today, but time is slipping away.  I'd rather go be with my kid and have a few drinks and just be happy to ring in the new year, so that i shall... Read More
Posted by: swordmaiden on 2007-12-31 20:50:40
Average Rating: No Rating | Views: 40 | # Comments: 0 | Tags: