So every night I go to sleep hoping tomorrow will be better.   Not so much!!!!!  Although my relationship with Eric, naturally, has it's ups and downs I know that he loves me.  I feel overwhelmed with love when I am with him.  Unfortunately, he can't be with me all the time, and being that I am not working a full time job right now I have a lot of time to think.  I think about the fact that it has been seven months since I left David, and still I am no closer to getting divorce papers as I was the day I left.  I feel bad that he is hurt that I am with someone new, and that I have caused the hurt that he is feeling.  I am glad though that we are passed the angry stages of this divorce.  I haven't missed him since I left, the only thing that is missed is what was comfortable when I was with him.  I had no worries when it came to finacial matters while I was with him.  But you can't live on money alone.  I need someone who is going to be here for me, hold me, and who would have ever guessed, pay attetion to me.  I needed someone who wanted to support me in my weight loss, and schooling.  He always says he could love me the way I needed and I guess he is right.  His idea of loving me was providing basic material needs, and even though that is good, I still wanted to have my emtional needs met too.  I would much rather have him hold me and tell me we would make it through all the hard times then for him to ignore me and give me a big house and wardrobe.  I guess it is true about the love langues.  I am happy that I have these needs met with Eric, but since I am just getting myself on my own two feet I am a bit stressed about my own finacial situation.  But without Eric I think that it would all seem worse than it is.  I have also noticed that as far as Havelock goes I only have a very few select friends that I can trust.  And right now I am missing them all and would do anything to hang out with them.  But I guess it is a busy time for all, I know when I have a lot going on I get to negleticting my friendships.  Well for now I am going to go. I just wanted to get these thoughts down in hopes that I will feel less stress.  Smooches to you all.