Let's start from the beginning. The truth..

I am a person who is recovering from having her heart tossed in the waves beyond the deep dark ocean. The amount of sorrow that has came, has passed. I would of never believed it initially that as time goes on so would I. A few months ago, I would not believe I would travel with time that I would remain rooted to that spot forever watching everything go by me. Today i still have those moments when I don't understand why I am still standing still while everything seems to be moving and continuing.

My heart. It hurt. The amount of sorrow. The pain that trapped inside of me. I forgot for a while. Today I felt the tears prickle again. Why have the tears came back after a couple of months without its existence. Why are the tears evident again? Yes like another typical love and loss story, yearning and hurting over one does not change within any true love story.

I miss him today, again. Today I thought about him. I think I am afraid to let go of what we had, all those years together.. they were so precious to me. But realising that I have to let them go, makes me miss him. Makes me afraid, makes me awake, that this is real. That he is gone, they all these memories is just weighing me further down. I'm afraid, to be on my own. I always wanted to share everything with him. But it's always easier to remember the happy moments when you are missing someone, that somehow all their flaws and flaws in the relationship disappears.. The truth is. The missing will pass, with time. I know the love is still there but I also know that loving someone who can't return it back, is just digging yourself a hole. I want to be happy, I do. So for today I missed him but I will not let it hold me back and make me live in the past.