| View Blog
|
| How to judge two books with the same cover
|
|
|
Note:
Before anyone decides they want to yell "racist!" I want to give a warning that if these personal opinions of mine seem offensive, don't read them. Save yourself some discomfort.
Context of the rant this time:
-I'm taking two courses on race, both which are talking about how minorities are/were being screwed over by White Americans.
-In my Asian Americans study class, we are currently covering the topic of second generation Asian Americans, as well as the Japanese internment camps that were surrounded with theories such as "once a Jap always a Jap", disregarding that many were American-born citizens, etc.
Warning: this is your final reminder that this could be touchy. Please do not take offense to what I have to say, for I am just trying to be honest with myself and this blog.
This all starts about two or three years ago, when my friends and I were all hanging out at -------'s dad's house. I forgot what exactly we were talking about while sitting around the pool, but the following reaction to something I said/did stuck with me: "Wow, Steph, you're such a FOB!"
Now, initially this doesn't seem too bad. We were just a bunch of high schoolers, all very close friends, and all of different cultures/backgrounds. The friend who said this to me was of German descent, and I know he did not mean anything malicious. Yet, comparing me to a FOB struck such a chord that I was a little offended--even hurt. For those of you who might not know, FOB stands for "Fresh Off the Boat", and was used around my area to describe the Asian immigrants (sometimes in a derogatory way).
Let me tell you what FOB stood for in our "youth culture" sense. There were quite a few FOBs in the high school I attended, but they generally stuck together and could be heard speaking Asian languages in the hallway. They dressed differently than the other kids at school, mostly because their wardrobe followed the trends in Tokyo, Taiwan, Korea, etc. They listened to "FOB music" (Asian pop, mostly), and brought Asian lunches. Most of them were pale. (This is actually a big fashion trend in Asia--to be pale. How strange that America is the opposite.) Lastly, guys and girls alike sported dyed hair (usually reddish brown or orange) and "FOB" haircuts. (Take a look at some Anime if you don't know what I mean.)
This was what he compared me to. I was appalled. I remember that I quickly retorted with a playful yet hurt "Hey!" and jokingly splash water at him, denying that I was a FOB. This happened so many years ago, but it still bugs me today. Why, you ask? Because on several occasions after that incident, I've been asked (with good intentions) by fellow Americans whether or not I was born in this country. Each time it has happened, I've been slightly surprised that they could not tell the difference between an Asian American and an Asian immigrant. And yes, slightly offended. Do I look that different in the way that I dress? (right now I'm wearing Pacsun jeans and a DC t-shirt) Is my English bad? (Born and raised in California....don't think so.) What about me gave you the idea that I am not an American? Is it simply because Asians "all look alike"? Is it because I am not what you think of when you imagine an "American" girl?
Of course there's also the question of "why the hell am I so offended about this?" Maybe it's because I'm done with these assumptions. Maybe because I'm sick of being told that all Asians look alike (though truthfully, I sometimes poke fun at this "fact" myself). Maybe because FOBs are culturally everything that I feel I am not--yet we look similar in that we have black hair (before it's dyed), dark brown/black eyes, and "yellow" skin. It's like looking in the mirror and telling your reflection "NO! You're not supposed to pronounce that word like that!", all the while begging that someone Caucasian won't snicker at such "Asian" behaviors. I think, in the end, it's really a struggle for my identity as an Asian American, not just an Asian. And seeing these FOBs just reminds me of how different, and similar, I am to them. I can dress, behave, speak, and think differently from them...but in the end we still look "the same".
Here lies the sad reality that there will still be people who will assume I am not American simply because of my race. And I now present to you, dear readers, the question: "What does an American look like?" |
|
Posted by stephybum on 2008-04-30 14:01:51 | Rating: | Views: 106
|
| |
|
|
| Blog Comments
|
|
|
|
I always thought americans were red skined!
Or big headed, you improve your country by being there. What is so bad about looking asian? Must you look caucasian to be american? Come to the UK we are so mixed caucasian is a bad thing!
You have less chance of getting a job, less rights to keep a job, less freedom of speach, less chance of having a home. This list goes on and is getting longer. Be happy you can't be called racist for what your saying.
|
|
Posted by yadokta
on 2008-04-30 14:55:35
|
|
|
|
|
A true "american" where the people that were there before the europeans came...example...cherokee, Pima, Chehalis...you know, Native Americans. Now because of such huge immigration, Americans, are anyone...Swedes, dutch, brits, asians, etc. BTW, good post and there are still us natives around...I'm Pima 100%
|
|
Posted by Truebluedrmr
on 2008-08-13 12:25:05
|
|
|
|
|
|
