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 getting bored

I hope this is the same font and color and size o_0

Well, as the title indicates, I feel like I"m getting rather bored.  Bored in general, not like some sort of passing moment in today's agenda where I have nothing to really do or want to do. Here are just some of the things that have been occupying my mind recently:

#1  Hair dye
(warning: may sound like a superficial valley girl rant about hair)
(if you want to avoid this, just skip to the bottom of the chunk)

Of all my features, my hair was one that I could feel a shy pride about.  Friends, relatives, hairdressers, and even strangers have commented on how "nice" it looks and how soft or healthy my hair is.  Last year, getting ready for school consisted of a quick facial rinse, teeth-brushing, getting dressed and heading out the door while hand-combing my hair--and it always worked.  My hair was flawless.  And while it grew longer it would gingerly remind me to get a trim or something, and if I ignored it for too long maybe two or three split ends would appear.  But this year, it's been a disaster from one day to the next. I wake up, and my hair is sticking up on one side of my head.  Or my bangs refuse to fall to the side like they're supposed to.  The highlights are slowly dying out, and I can never seem to part it along the same line everyday. To put it in simple terms: I look like shit.
SO to try and fix this hairy predicament of mine, I go down into good 'ol Westwood to get a nice trim/styling from a hair salon I went to last year.  Last year I got good results, great service, and it was only $15.  This year I received everything that I did the year before--for 45 bucks. And then they ask for a tip. (my wallet cries). At first I cringed a bit, but shrugged it off since I was satisfied with this haircut.  Little did I know, that two days from this visit I would be wrestling with the mass on top of my head.
Here I am, frustrated and just begging myself to do something to change it. So far, I've considered dying it a different color, or streaking it something insane. A cry for attention?  Not really, just a chemical way for me to protest against my ex-best feature. The only thing holding me back is my obsession with salvaging the hair quality. Oh, and of course, I don't want to end up looking like all the other Asian girls with orange hair or *shudder* blonde hair or even worse--blue streaks that have gone green-and-bleach-haywire. (quoting from a friend's mom, "Christmas tree!")

#2 Ear piercing

In the ear piercing department, I guess you can say I'm a late bloomer. (But not as late as Mom, who pierced them for her wedding.) I had my ears pierced, the old-fashioned location, right at the beginning of my Senior year in high school.  My experience was not good.  After hopping from one shady location to the next, (I was being rejected since I was under 18 and my parents were not with me), my friends and I were finally accepted at a certain piercing/tattoo/hair salon place downtown. Let me just describe what it looked like: the exterior was generously painted black, and the interior was this deep purple.  The walls were covered with all sorts of crazy hair-dye colors, and jewlery for piercings god-knows-where. The people inside were nice enough, but the crazy hair/hair color, piercings up the wazoo, and tattoos wherever there was skin gave me a feeling that I was somewhere very different than Claire's.
Long story short, I almost passed out during the process (I think the guy hit a nerve or something), and while I was being laid down and handed a cold pepsi the other guy in the parlor bailed on his friend (made me feel much better) for fear of assuming responsibility for a minor. And now, three years later, my piercings are still infected every other week, and they bleed every other time I wear earrings. Not much incentive to get another one.
But, alas, I am bored and wish I could gain the courage to get another piercing, this time a cartilage (maybe). I want to do something that is spontaneous, a little dangerous, and guaranteed to be disapproved of by my parents.

#3 Joining a gay-straight alliance club

This has been something on my to-do list ever since I entered UCLA. There are a lot of things that trouble me about this, and are holding me back from joining. First, I have no idea which groups there are and which ones would be most friendly to an ally.  Second, how useful would I be if I can't even vote? (I'm not registered yet.) Third, would my friends view me differently? Would they act differently around me if I were to join said club? They crack "gay" jokes all the time, and guy-on-guy molestation is always used for laughs. I also know that I have a few friends who are homophobic. So what would they say? Lastly, I am and have been questioning the possibility of a bisexual orientation (which I know my boyfriend is a little uncomfortable with), and I know that if I join a club with an equally confused girl I would be tempted to explore that side of me. My boredom and desire to do something new doesn't really help in this department.

#4 Guitars

People have weird fetishes all the time. Right? Riiiiighhht?? Well, whatever it is, I think my fetish would have to be a guy that can play the acoustic guitar and sing while playing.  Something about it just makes me melt. I can't help but swoon. Here's my problem: there's a severe lack of guitar-playing in my life right now. During the summer, friends would always gather and we'd sit around, someone would pick up the guitar (usually Z) and it'd be nice to enjoy. And last year, if I was lucky, I would catch my boyfriend playing guitar in his room and singing quietly.  This year, however, he's much busier and the guitar-learning phase has already passed within my group of friends here at UCLA.  What is it about guitars that turns me to jelly? Maybe the well-ingrained images of Spanish villas, young maidens on balconies, and serenading under the moonlight. Maybe it's all the love songs that are played quietly with just a voice and some simple chords and strumming.
This is also something I feel like I can't really bring up.  I feel like if I were to express this desire to hear some guitar-playing it would be considered nagging. And I don't want to come off as whining, as that would cause some frustration and eventually arguing.  le sigh.  But I really really really really miss the sound of a guitar. And, as always, there's just not enough time for that.

I guess that's all I have to rant about for the moment. I'm hungry. I think I'll go get some lunch.

    Posted by stephybum on 2008-04-18 14:13:22 | Rating: | Views: 87
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stephybum
California ( Northern ), United States

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 Stuck with apathy
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