Arrive home about 6, stopped at the pub on the way for a 6 pack and some coke.
I would've gone home first then gone up, but the car is making a horrible noise someplace up the front end, so its whatever I can squeeze into the back in 2L bag on the back of the bike.
Can't get a new rear tyre, least the brand I want for love or money. And it's getting down there, taking it easy I is. Easy on the quick manouvres. Just make it home and wait for the tyre to make it into the country (so they say)

Phone call, the other half won't be home, got the opportunity to keep on working and he's got bills to pay as well.
I was looking forward to seeing him tonite, but it's not going to happen.

A bit of a clean up and venture into the loft.
The loft is similar to a man's shed. But it isn't a loft and it isn't a shed, It is merely the room that I took over. It is a place of contentment where I go to work on projects that could take months, or years or might even look like never being finished.
Needless to say, it's a bombsite.
Someone has gone so far to steal my extention lead again, in my long absence.
What is it with these things? Have those European scientists succeeded already, the black hole of lost extention leads and light bulbs swiped from the laundry rears its ugly head yet again.
It's a bit like the tool box I got for my birthday once, it contained a shifter, a philips screwdriver, a slothead, few other bits n pieces. I got it cause, well I moaned quite constantly for some months about how a breadknife was only good for so much.
Amazingly enough I still have the shifter, its been rescued a number of times from its inbuilt homing device, the one that homes itself back to the giftor. I still have the tool box as well - 10 yrs later. But if you're going to give a gift, then you might as well make it something that you would want yourself.

Contentment, the shifter resides in it's tool box, my sharp pair of scissors are re-found amongst loft turmoil, such meagre possessions that ultimately say a lot about what potentially could be left behind.

Another $25 payed off on the credit card. While cleaning out the loft, I come across a letter from the bank. An invitation to increase my potential debt. I've been getting these for some years now.
This one reads, (with sarcasm, I've never taken them up on their offer so far)

• You've only got a small limit, which you've maxed out completely for years, but hey you're really doing a good job keeping up the repayments on your never ending debt. Oh and by the way, we're putting up the interest rates next month.
• Just because you are proving your worth at making the repayments next month, we thought it might be a great idea to give you the opportunity to double your limit. You know you need that holiday huh. Gees you're doing so well keeping up y'know. So here's an opportunity - go for it.
• Of course you're not so stupid that you don't understand that you could be potentially up for bucket loads should you be insanely stupid to max out this offer, but we just know you can do it. Hey you've proved you can pay a paltry amount regularly so far, so you should find it really easy to just double it. We've got faith in you.

Herein lies your next bible lesson - Temptation. Another slothville treat right up there with greed and mayhem.
As my debt and despair gradually decreases with every payday, so the shopping list grows longer and longer.
It is extroadinarily difficult to actually continue to whittle down that list and refine it to what is exactly important. But i've had sometime to think about it now and it's pretty clear what on the top of the list.

There's also been time to consider what other people have said, particularly those from a former generation. You know you've heard it along similar lines, "Well, back then there was no credit, if you couldn't buy it, then you just didn't have it".
I'm sure just like me, you had to fight back a terrible desire to just clonk these old farts on the head. So I've asked myself and others from both my generation and previous, "Is it actually any easier to get ahead now than it was then?"
It's a pretty easy one to answer, past wages, past CPI, what your money could buy, gradually the gap has widened considerably over not all that long really. Ooh and not forgetting life was much simpler then.
Tho I spose one thing thats in our favor now, least we have more easier ways of birth control, apart from stuffing a lemon up the fanny and who knows what else. Tho depending on what country you live in, what faith has the majority and boundless other questions, getting a lemon is the the least of your worries.

By the way, I don't believe in God, or any God in that matter. I gave it away finally about a year ago. I could not believe in any God that could be, well, so two faced on any matter pertaining to the frivolites of life and death, any God that seeks death and retribution for any slight regarding humanity or  laws.
And the teachers of faiths, they certainly have a lot to answer for when it comes down to taking advantage of peoples in their most vulnerable of moments, preying on fears and the disadvantaged.  To me, the teachings of pretty well all regions that I've come accross, echo a similar thing. Most is to be congradulated, and most of it is basic life skills. How to be behave, whats right, whats going to get you in the poo real quick. Pretty basic, get along with your neighbour kind of stuff. I believe in that bit, but there's no way that I would ever be a part in anything else. The descrepancies, the foolishness, the injustice, the inhumanity, 2 faced, bigotry, inequality are to be deplored - and all that power play. In fact, look in the dictionary for anyword that starts with "in.." and that probably about sums it up.
Sounds like a tune, " Try a little kindness.. over look the blindness....of the narrow minded people of the narrow minded streets" du du dey

Shame he used to beat his wife.

I on the other hand is looking forward to my husband coming home and just being here after a week at the office and continuing on with the 5 yr plan. Counting down the days now to the Equinox and the days getting longer. So much to do, so little daylight/time.
And thank you for yours.