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Some days are defined by the difficulty they bring. Yesterday was one such day for me. My morning started out bad, and while I will not go into detail about this, suffice it to say it was not good. I made it through my work day with a lot of thoughts rolling through my head. Mostly thoughts of other people and my impact on their lives. I chose to set all of this aside at the end of the day and go to dinner with my husband and some friends to improve my mood.
On our way to dinner, as is our usual schedule, we picked up the mail. The mail brings both good and bad news, bills and cards, you never know what it might bring. Today it brought mother's death certificates. This was a blow to the stomach, I was not prepared for. I thought I had a couple of weeks to deal with my feelings before faced with this realistic..tactile representation of her death. Not to be. I opened it and read it. The contents made me sick almost to a faint. I am not sure why..I know she is dead. I am guessing that it is the finality of seeing it in black and white.
I was thinking later last night that most our lives are represented by.. little sheets of paper... From start to finish...all of us are represented by..little sheets of paper. I can hold in my hand the beginnning of life with a birth certificate and in the other hand hold the end of life..a death certificate. I come to realize that it is all the ..little sheets of paper.. in between these two sheets that sum up our lives.
The first little sheet in our lives the birth certificate is watched for and waited for by anxious parents..A solid tactile representation of the love between two people that resulted in a human life. From there, there are the all important immunization records, babtism records and preschool papers. The kindergarten diploma, the middle school diploma and all the little awards and acolades bestowed on a small person as they make their way through the young years. All of these little sheets of paper are treasured and pressed in books, saved in folders and sometimes displayed proudly on walls.
The highschool diploma, college diploma (if you were lucky enough to have attended), are all little sheets of paper that are sought after sometimes with a few tears of frustration. Then comes the love papers..marriage license and birth certificates for your own children. All of their little momentos are saved and treasured and held onto for the memories they hold.
Sadly for some people there are little sheets of paper that hold sad and sometimes devastating memories..divorce papers, diagnosis of a serious illness or the loss of a child. These papers represent a dream lost, and are held onto purely to represent what once was. At the end of our lives the final..little sheet of paper.. is our death certificate. This sheet of paper will no doubt bring sorrow to the receiver, as it has done to me. In the end, our lives are summed up by the memories we leave and all the...little sheets of paper..we leave behind.
peace :) shemelts |
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Posted by shemelts on 2008-06-27 15:55:57 | Rating: | Views: 68
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Very heatfelt and touching post, shemelts.
*hugs*
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Posted by angelwings
on 2008-07-02 07:21:32
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That was a wonderful post. First time I have stopped by. You really did touch me with what you said. It is so true.
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Posted by Fancie
on 2008-07-02 16:06:01
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i love the way you think, you rock sister friend!!!i will send youa smile to cheer you up,just a big goofy smile, peace my friend
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Posted by bjm1
on 2008-07-04 00:53:10
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Sorry for you loss.
Hugs
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Posted by 1221dol0306
on 2008-07-05 09:26:55
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I never thought about any of this in terms of pieces of paper. Your right and this was a touching post!
You know the kicker to it all is most of the time you have to pay for the "pieces of paper".
When we lost my mother in law everyone (debt collectors, funeral home and others, insurance people) all wanted copies of the death certificate at $25.00 a pop! Sick isn't it!?!
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Posted by anotherdaze
on 2008-07-05 12:00:44
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