sigh. things are silly. things are confusing. and i feel guilty sometimes when i hear people talk about problems, cos i dont have that same problem, cos im doing well in that area of my life, it makes me feel guilty. and i hate that feeling, i mean, i should be happy for myself that things are finally starting to work out. and not feeling bad that those same things are going terrible for other people. i dont know if its a good thing that i am sensitive, or if i am just being stupid, or if i need to feel worse or what. i really dont know. i hate that i cant make other people feel better. it hurts me so much to see him hurting and he's just my friend, my brother. but i still feel awful when he's down, when people are stoopid towards him, when it doesnt work out. cos i have it so good, so how can i say to him im sorry stuff is bad for you at the moment, how can i help. cos i cant help. cos its not bad for me. and i cant say i no how u feel, cos i really dont, i can imagine, but thats it. i can ONLY imagine. and it kills me that he is not as happy as me. cos i love him. he's my favourite brother minus the blood connection. and what really gets to me is that he actually doesnt deserve to be treeated the way he is treated. which sux. cos he's amazing, kind, generous, loving, caring, Godly, and he's just an amzing person. and im sick of the world being stoopid to him. im sick of people lying to him, im sick of people taking advvantage of him. im sick of people using him, and im sick of people judging him. its not fair, ok? all humans need to be treated fairly. and i know that doesnt happen, cos i mean look at all the third world countries and stuff. life really sucks at the moment for a lot of people, and i hate that i have it so good that i cant relate to them, or even grasp what can help them to feel better.

im sorry.