This morning, I was thinking about how I want to be God's woman. I would like a mentor, someone who will disciple me.

I thought, "John would not support me in that; he might VERBALIZE support, but he would not REALLY want me to be that focused on anyone but him." (I don't mean my mentor, but the focus on Jesus.)

Which I feel gives me my answer. God wants me, I want God, and John will come between that.

He sends me e-mails, "I'm trying to get over you, please don't contact me," but he continues to send e-mails. So it's like he's baiting me . . . I KNOW he's baiting me.

So I MUST be strong, and not reply. And if he e-mails again, I can say, "I'll quit replying when you quit e-mailing."