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| 8.24 Behind the Scenes...
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Thank you for your reply. I
am so moved by your caring. You and I are absolutely on the same page.
I have enrolled my psychopharm, and we agreed to be in constant
communication. I am seeing her 9/5. Be assured, I too have
professional experience, and I am approaching this responsibly. It is
a bit of a tightrope, but don't worry I have a strong net under me--not
only her professional expertise (I have been working with her for 18+
months), but also the loving support of dear friends like you.
Partnership is an Exploration. Our second weekend was about being with
"The Alien," or being with "I don't know." In addition to my
professional expertise, I am applying the distinctions of
Partnership--Speciifically the awareness that who we are is given to
use by our network of conversations, and that our conversations are
given to us by four fields--Mother/Child, Father/Child,
Playmate/Sibling and Admirer/Admired. In my writing about the
exploration, and as a creative artist, I am coming from the field of
Playmate/Sibling. In the moment of this reply, I am coming from the
fields of Father/Child (supplying information), Mother/child
(reassuring) and Admirer/Admired (moved and grateful).
Notice that I'm not in Playmate/Sibling--as this conversation is
"straight" not playful. What may be alrming or disconcerting is that
in the postings I am "surfing the fields," also coming from the
"Renaissance" Episteme (another Partnership distinction) which is all
about metaphor and poetry, and disregard of "logical" structure.
I am writing as a poet/storyteller/clown--taking artistic license as much as I can get away with.
In terms of the Partnership coursework, I am exploring "The Alien."
The great 20th century writer James Joyce had a daughter who was
schizophrenic. In commenting that the way he wrote was analagous to
the way she thought, he said that the difference was that he knows
exactly what he is doing--he viewed the artist as "objective", the
neutral observer of the play of consciousness. His schizophrenic
daughter, other the other hand, was powerless over and unaware of what
was going on in her brain. Thus the difference between the self-aware
artist and the unconsious mind of the truly mentally impaired person.
[My other literary influences are Samuel Beckett, Charles Dickens,
Harriet Beecher Stowe, Mark Twain and Vladimir Nabokov. (THese come to
mind right now, but there are plenty of others I have assimilated over
the last 45 years of writing, publishing and studying writing.)]
So, I believe I have the right strategies in place, such that what I am
doing is audacious but not foolish.ANd I get that you are really there
for me, and your expression of that is an unexpected blessing that has
come about as an unintended result of your being my partner in this
exploration!
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Posted by sdingle on 2007-08-24 11:06:09 | Rating: | Views: 88
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