Thoughts.com Blogs - Not this shit again.[Comment please.]

View Blog

Not this shit again.[Comment please.]

It seems like this summer is going to be a drag. D:

I woke up at 6 this morning. Lol. Who in the hell wakes up at 6 in the morning during the summer. Summer school kids. Lol. Well really I woke up at 4:25. Scared out of my mind. I keep having this dream, over and over, that these men are hurting me. Like bad. And everytime I have this dream my boyfriend is always there, but he's asleep. So it scares me. And like the first thing that he said when I told him about it was "Do you really think I would let that happen to you?" I mean yea thats really reassuring and all, but in my dream you were asleep, how do you know whats happening to me in your sleep. So anyway, in this dream, it's like everytime I try to scream for help, they hurt me more. And this dream has been going on for 3 days straight now. If I wake up from it, and then go back to sleep, it just starts over. It's making me not want to sleep at all.

So I texted Zach. Yes, at 4:25. But we have this agreement that if we really need each other, we can text or call at anytime. And I didn't really need him, but it was like one of those let me know you still care kinda things. WELL I guess he doesn't. When I texted him he was being an ass about everything. So I felt the need to ask him if he was hiding anything from me. And of course he said no. But yea. How believable is that?

Let me first explain the strain on mine and Zachs' relationship before anyone starts thinking he is an asshole. Well he moved to Arizona for college. And he's staying there. His whole family is there too. And I trust him, but I don't trust other people that are around him. He's not ugly, many girls find him hot. Which I hate using hot, it's way to overrated. He still comes here to see me. But it's one of those, anything could happen kinda things. What kind of person even wants to believe that their boyfriend is cheating on them, no matter how many miles away he is. For me it takes true love to trust someone that far away. And it takes love for him to know that even though he could get away with it, he's not going to.

So then after all of this happens. I get up to go wake my mom up. My mom and I are pretty close. But she has her days. So when I went to wake her up, her boyfriend was in her bed. Not a huge shocker. But they could get in a lot of trouble because he is going through a divorce and it's not final yet. But she starts yelling at me for like no reason at all. I just woke her up so she wouldn't be late for work.

Her and my dad were divorced for almost 7 years when he died. But she still loved him. After they got a divorce, he moved to Tennessee. To be with this little slag who got him heavy into drugs. He always smoked weed, but little did we know she was into killing her husbands. Her previous husband she had induced a heartattack to. But of course we didn't know this. So naturally to my dad she was the best thing ever. WELL they broke up. Which was a good thing. So he meets this other woman. She's pretty cool and she seems nice enough. She takes my dad on this huge cross country cop chase. I didn't see my dad for almost 4 years. Then when he comes back, the cops finally catch up with him, and he gets arrested. He was in jail for 2 years. Not to mention those two women are now together. Which our family found out at his funeral. My grandma bailed him out of jail for my birthday. Please understand that my dad wasn't a bad person. Just a good person caught in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Past my childhood. Lol. I'm stuck at summer school now. Bored. And stuck in a room with 10 rednecks. Someone shoot me? I'll end up writing agiain before the day is over.

Blogging get a lot off of your chest.

Wow writing this all down sounds like a episode on Jerry Springer. Lol. Sorry this is so long. But if you read this all you should so respond to it.

Peace for now. :D