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sucky apartment

I've been in egypt for a lil over a week now. Things are going a little bit better. And I'm not a total emotional wreck. For a couple days I was doing pretty bad emotionally, but things have gotten better for both me and Samara. I am glad about that because it was a little rough. I still miss and love my mom so much obviously. But for the couple days that went by everytime someone brought up my mom's name or when Samara kept going on and on about my mom I just wanted to burst out in tears and cry over and over again. But I didn't cry as much as I could have, because I had to be strong for Samara and be a positive influence in her life and try my best to show her that we miss and love my mom but she is not gone. We will see her again and we are trying to make it here and see how things go. I really do hope they go well. But I think no matter how much time went by I would still want to be back in the United States back in North Carolina, what I call home. It is my home and I have lived in a lot of states but it is home to me and will always be home. I think we are going to get married soon. We had plans to get married yesterday then today but things didn't work out that way. But that doesn't upset me or anything. Because I am not in a rush to get married. But this is a very conservative country and it is not acceptable to be living together and not married. So we will have to get married pretty soon. I didn't know until recently but Ahmed told me that he had to lie to all his friends and tell them that we were already married and that I was his wife. I was a little bit upset about that. And I hope they don't question anything regarding that in the future, because I'm the type of person that I do not lie and will not lie especially about details. Because I am not ashamed and have nothing to be ashamed about, but I know with being in Egypt and the different culture things are a lot different here than they are in the united states. Which I understand and respect. But like I'm saying I would hope they wouldn't directly ask me anything about it because I wouldn't lie and I'm sure if they found out the truth then Ahmed and his friends would be upset about that. But I do not know. He had rented an apartment for a week that we were first here and it was the most horrible place I have ever stayed. The doors were broken, it was so dirty, the walls were gross, the floor was gross....it was too high up we were on the 10th floor and I hate heights. And I smoke, so everytime we went outside to smoke I just had visions of either jumping, falling or somebody pushing me off the balcony and falling to a horrible nasty bloody death. OMG the bathroom was so disgusting we had the buy cleaner for the bathroom and I was cleaning that bathroom for about 1-1 1/2 hours literally! I made sure they were busy watching a movie while I was in there cleaning because I didn't want Samara to try to come in there when I was in the middle of that. Besides the nasty bathroom we couldn't use the sink in the bathroom because it was ghetto rigged together with tissue and tape and when I touched it the pipes came apart and seperated. Then there was a leak and the bathroom was half way flooded anyway. And they didn't care obviously because they had laid down a bed sheet to have it absorb some of the water, which didn't do much at all anyway. Then the beds were horrible it was like sleeping on a piece of flat wood. It was not a real bed. I probably wouldn't of slept better if I made a cott on the floor, which I did not do because they also had roaches and ants in there!!!! EWwwwwwww.....And no AC's and the only window unit they had didn't even work. And we came on a hot week so we were like sweating everyday pretty much that we were there. Oh yea...and they didn't have hot running water so we all had to take cold showers! So much to tell but I'll think I'll stop at that, because I think I complained enough about the sucky ass apartment. So we are at his mom's house. Since we aren't married obviously we aren't sleeping together so I sleep in one room with Samara and he slept in another. But now he is sleeping in the couch because his brother and his family came back to stay for a little bit until they move, so he had to go back to sleeping on the couch. But I think we will be here for another 2 weeks or so then we will be moving to Cairo to live since him and his friend are starting up that restaurant. They are making an American style rest. so I'll be helping them out with recipes and anything else that they need help with.

Posted by saraelgazzar on 2009-11-02 17:34:37 | Rating: