Frustrated-
disappointed; thwarted; having a feeling of or filled with frustration; dissatisfied.

   Disappointment is something that all people learn to deal with in life. I'm frankly, sick of dealing.  I can't help but sound slightly more than piteous when i say that i feel anytime i am thrown a line, i take the bait only to have my cheek torn open leaving a gushing wound of calamity. The saddest part is that more often than not, i am well aware of possible repercussions ans STILL i bite the hook of defeat.
  I can't seem to deny my desire for things that are realistically unobtainable and shouldn't be desirable. For some reason unknown to me, these things seem to be for me,  the more attractive, and finer things in life. This questionable behavior has gone without answer for entirely too long.
  They say insanity if repeating the same behavior expecting different results.They say you always want what you can't have; the grass is greener on the other side of the fence; the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior; and people don't change.
   There you have it.