Thoughts.com Blogs - peed in a sleeping bag, had to go to confession

A very popular 7th grader was having a pj party.

She was the oldest girl in a family of 10

all overachievers

from the perfect family

another story

I was so excited to be invited

yet

absolutely petrified

because

I was a bed wetter

my brothers had been blackmailing me for years

did anyone see the Michael Landon movie about bed wetting?

oh well

another story

it was humiliating

my mother was not understanding about it either

she acted like I did it on purpose

if only my father would have confided in me

and told me he was also a bed wetter

I think I would have felt so much better about myself

but he kept that info under the covers for over 40 years

I was tortured by this affliction

the teenaged daughter of a family friend used to stay with us whenever her parents went out of town.

She attended Mother McAuley and was about 10 years older

I idolized her

whenever she was around

my parents made us share my big double bed

I never slept a wink

I would have to build elaborate barricades

with pillows and blankets to separate us

and

if I accidentally fell asleep

which I always did

I'd have to hog part of her side

to prevent her from rolling over on the wet spot

and every morning I'd have to play possum

until she got up and got dressed

before I could move off the wet spot

in my wet PJs

How in the world did I ever think I was pulling the wool over her eyes,

it smelled like a mens urinal my small room

that's another story

I almost declined the coveted invitation

I simply could not take such a risky chance that might expose my secret

I'd be the laughing stock of the entire neighborhood

I decided the only way I could do it

was

to stay up all night long

no matter what

the popular girls older brother offered me his sleeping bag

because I did not have one of my own.

when everyone began to settle down,

I just kept talking

pretty soon

the only one listening was the family poodle

Fe Fe

and then it happened

I was only in dreamland for about 10 minutes

however

somehow

no matter how much I fought it

I feel asleep

and wet the borrowed sleeping bag

and soaked my pjs

I was sure my life was over

until I had a truly brilliant idea

I grabbed Fe Fe

stuffed her in my sleeping bag

waited a few minutes

then

screamed

ugh, oogh, ick

"the dog peed all over me and the sleeping bag..eek"

OMG!

people came running from every direction

before I knew it

her dad

swatted poor fe fee

and her mom kept repeating

bad dog

bad fe fe

the aoplogies were flying

none of them could do enough for me

I was ushered into their shower immediatley

and my pjs were laundered before I knew what hit Fi Fi

it was a rolled up newspaper

I felt horrible for that poor dog

but then again

glad it wasn't me

having my nose rubbed in my pee

that's why on the way home

I stopped off at confession

Bless me father for I have sinned

I peed in a sleeping bag and blamed it on a poodle

they thought it was a poodle puddle

but it was me