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This weekend was fun, I went to see my best friend in Jacksonville and her family. I love her girls and I had a great time with them. They are such cuties and Kir spent a lot of time in her first 2 years with me so she gets really happy to see me. It was a good time to go because I needed some time to think. Even with all my thinking I have no conclusions that I am happy with.
On Thursday night Bri said that he loved me but he wasn't always attracted to me. Last year it was because I wasn't thin enough. I lost a lot of weight and then he was really into me and I loved the attention and the sex. Sometimes it was all night! Well, now although I haven't gained wait we are back to the same thing but now it's because my stomach is not tone.
He says he loves me, he wants his life with me and that he's content. I just don't know what to do about it. I feel like if he were in love, he would be attracted to me regardless. He says girls are different then guys. Girls work on feelings where as guys are more physical. He's still affectionate and he tries to make everything work and I know he loves me but I don't know if I can live with it. A part of me says I've had the sexual attraction and the person has lied. I should also note that Bri is honest to a fault.
The issue is that it hurts, I want to be loved completely. We talk about everything and I'm just scared that the next thing will be I'm not good enough for some other reason. Then I think of the way I look at him, I love him regardless of how he looks, once I love him it's completely. Uggh!!
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Posted by prelude2it on 2008-02-24 23:25:31 | Rating: | Views: 72
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always feel good about yourself first, be happy with you, and he is lucky to have your great heart, take care...
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Posted by bjm1
on 2008-02-24 23:52:54
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Do you mind if I ask what ever happened to R.? Did he and Christie get married? Did they have the baby? Did he ever marry her?
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Posted by caringadvis
on 2008-02-25 05:05:16
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