Thoughts.com Blogs - Dinner the killer rabbit

When my daughter was an infant my husband and I were the only one out of our circle of friends that had our own home.We became a storage unit for some and a dumping ground for unwanted pets.Such as they had to move to an apartment that didnt accept pets.

We ended up with a killer rabbit.This I can thank Ira for.Stupid Ira....he was my best friends boyfriend at the time.He had a boa constrictor and this was a big rabbit.Naturally it wasnt to become dinner for "squeeze".So I ended up with "dinner" that had anxiety problems and growled.I cant say I blame him.I'd be anxious too if I was to be someones dinner.

I kept dinner outside he had the run of the backyard during the day and at night I would put him in his pen.Even the dog was afraid of dinner,that rabbit would chase him relentlessly.

I go outside to pen up dinner for the night.Dummy me didnt close the door all the way.In runs dinner..like lightening he runs his furry ass through the house.He ends up in my bedroom behind the bed.Its a water bed so I cant just move it.Im down on all fours my face to the floor the little bastard charges me.Im thinking take one to the face or get out of the way.I decide to get out of the way.I go get the cage,I put some produce out trying to coax him out.Its been a few hours and now I'm just pissed off.Why cant I catch a stupid rabbit?I know I'll call my Dad.

My Dad shows up now hes face down to the floor ass in the air.Little bastard charges him as well only he manages to scratch my Dads hand.So now hes pissed(I'm laughing because its funny when it happens to someone else)"Get me a carrot or something".I go get a carrot.Heres the funny part my Dads on the ground coaxing this bastard of a rabbit with food saying "here nice bunny,youre such a nice bunny".Dinner charges again growls and nips at my Dad.Next thing I hear is a loud smack and "You son of a bitch!"rabbit goes running out towards the door.I have never seen my Dad move so fast.He threw a towel on the little son of a bitch grabbed him and threw his ass in the cage.The whole time I am laughing hysterically it was funny to watch.My Dad starts laughing and I ask "What did you do?" He said " the little bastard tried to bite me so I popped him".I really wish I had had a video of that.We had a good laugh,Dad saved the day and my carpet from rabbit pee and poop.

I learned a valuable lesson.Dont accept pets that were intended to be dinner.Its been 26 years since then and if I ever see Ira again I have a little bag of flaming cat poop waiting for him.