pretension
pre⋅ten⋅sion1 /prɪˈtɛnʃən/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [pri-ten-shuhn] Show IPA
Use pretension in a Sentence
–noun 1. the laying of a claim to something.
2. a claim or title to something.
3. Often, pretensions. a claim made, esp. indirectly or by implication, to some quality, merit, or the like: They laughed at my pretensions to superior judgment.
4. a claim to dignity, importance, or merit.
5. pretentiousness.
6. the act of pretending or alleging.
7. an allegation of doubtful veracity.
8. a pretext.
dictionary.com
as we meet peaces and pieces of ourselves coming together and the tensions are more than what actually is, and something inside of me says just relax and let it all go, all my preconceptions, my pretensions, what i think i am what others think i am and find my self amorphous, an electronic cloud of information lightning striking back and forth in a duel that is breaking my heart....




cave pearls....... (picture from wikipedia, the pearls i saw in my cave were...cultured, even when baroque, tiny freshwater and gone unnoticed, little baby teeth, not taken care of, all mixed up, my brother's and I, stained, been to the toothfairy and back, all mixed up, tapioca pearls and one little irritant, perhaps even one comment, with layers and layers of confusion covering it up.....a gross term for a female dog (why did you call me that?)
(or were you just in a pissy mood when you realized.....
i am
i am not
a disappointment.
)
(it could have been so many things, I wonder if you remember calling me that?)

lalala where did that come from?
quote in a mass emailing:
No denser veil than pretension exists between God and the devotee. There is no closer way to God than spiritual impoverishment before Him.
- Tustari in ‘Attar: “Tadhkirat”