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Has the world passed me by.. or have i passed it?

I don't know how to feel anymore. There's a gaping hole in between me and my reality. I had the perfect words to describe it until i finished that last sentence.. And now, i have writers block about my own feelings and emotions, so bare with me as i attempt to explain.

My life, the people and things in it, are no longer consistant with me. I no longer desire the road i'm on. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my friends like there's no tomorrow- all of them have gone out of their way at some point in time just to make my life more comfortable, and i have for them too. My issue is not my friends in any way, shape or form.. My issue is the lifestyle i have, in comparison to the lifestyle my mind desires. I don't care about being rich or famous or any silly notion like that. All i want is a healthy life- one filled with joy, one filled with physical and mental health.. A "normal" life- with ofcourse the occasional oddball to mix things up.

It's a hard thing to explain, but i almost feel like my mind has overtaken my physical playing field. I feel like my mind is already in the life i want.. And i'm not. If that makes sense to anyone but me i will be suprised.

So anyways, for anyone who has actually read this much of my blabbering, congratulations.. And i wish to share a secret with you.. The secret is.. "the secret" for anyone of you who knows what I'm talking about- give it more than just a little go, dedicate yourself to it- it works. For those who are sitting here thinking "WTF is the girl on about?" Go to google and search "the secret" and loads of pages will appear, take your pick and investigate.. If you wish to change yourself, your life and the things around you- learn it, trust it and live it up!