Thoughts.com Blogs - Francy, the cheeseplant, the mother and the Busy L

I couln't sleep last night cause it always takes me a day or two to adjust to my husband not being there when he goes away. I lay and looked out at the sky and watched the big tree outside form shapes in the wind. I don't know why - goes to show the kind of brain I have - but I always see things that remind me of something. Last night I saw one of the branches as a woman dancing as the leaves swayed. It took me back to some years ago when my daughter brought her then boyfriend's mother home to meet us. Tina was living in London at the time and we had only got over the shock of her boyfriend exisiting in the first place. He was 10 years older than her which seemed a big gap given she was only 21. (What am I talking about - I was married at that age). I suppose it was because he was a bit of a celebrity, very sophisticated, on television and in the papers a lot that worried us a bit.

My mum and aunt lived in a granny flat in our house at that time and I remember going down to tell her about his impending first visit. I didn't quite know how to approach the fact that this guy wasn't white, wasn't Protestant and wanted to marry her precious grand daughter. I needn't have worried. She shot past the first revolution and said 'Is he a Christian?' When I assured her he was, there was no further questions. She would, she said, judge for herself when she met him. Turned out the first time he came was during one of the heaviest snow falls we had had in years. He totally won Mum and Auntie over by doing all their shopping and carrying logs and coals in to ensure they were cosy.We got on really well and suggested he should bring his mother sometime for a visit. He told us she spent a lot of time in Uganda but had a flat in the centre of London.

Her visit was arranged for the spring and it was a magnificent day when we met them from the plane. She was very tall, very black, very erect and very colourful. She was a big lady! We got on rightaway. When it came to eating, she was very surprised at the food we ate - 'Where are the bones?' she asked when I served up the chicken in white wine. My mother was sitting at the head of the table, smiling at everyone cause she couldn't hear a lot and the Uganda accent had her a bit baffled. Now, picture the scene if you will. Molly, my mother, very genteel, soft grey hair, very bent, little white blouse with lace collar and a pale turquoise cardigan with pearl buttons. Nancy, my aunt, pure white hair, pink twinset and set of pearls, blue tweed skirt. Francy, big, black, big hoop earrings, big white teeth and wearing a caftan made of many colours. You get it? Let's just say it was East meeting West.

After dinner, we all retired to the lounge and Mum and Auntie went to sit in the little drawing room they loved as they could look out over Belfast Lough and watch the sun go down. As Mum could not hear well, she could not cope with a lot of talk which made her hearing aid screech like a banshee. Now Big Bryan is known for his generous servings of alcohol and he poured Francy a glass of good brandy. She liked it and asked for another. And another. My mother and aunt meanwhile, enjoyed a little glass of sherry each, normally reserved for Christmas, weddings and christenings. Ours was a jolly gathering with Francy, Tina and Paul (we'll call him that), all her brothers, a couple of friends and ourselves. Francy had taken herself to the kitchen and found a couple of chicken legs and was happily munching on the bones. 'Such waste you white people make,' she scolded, and had another brandy.

We were all too busy talking and hadn't noticed Francy leave the room. She had gone to talk to Mummy and Auntie in the drawing room, taking her brandy with her. My mother, coming from the heart of Ireland, was always really interested in other cultures as she was not well travelled herself, so she asked Francy a lot of questions about customs in Uganda. Meanwhile Robin, one of our younger sons, kindly poured them all another drink. That made about 6 brandies and 2 sherries.
Francy began to describe to them how her mother and grandmother had carried all their water from the well to the house in their village many years ago. Mother was intrigued. To demonstrate, Francy took a large Cheeseplant from the corner of the room and balanced it on her head. She walked round the room, legs bent, head back and did a perfect circle, big plant in tact. This was when the fun began. She urged my mother and aunt to 'grab a plant' and follow her. And they did. At this stage Robin returned to the room with another brandy and almost collapsed at what he saw. He rushed back to the lounge and told us all we had to come immediately. Please picture the scene:-

The house was early Victorian and full of furniture and paintings as near to that period as we could get. There was a big mahogony table in the middle which normally held an Aspidestra plant. The plant was gone and was on my mother's head. My aunt followed behind with a Busy Lizzie. Francy led the circle round the table, her feet bare, the bottom of her dress thrown over her shoulder and the big Cheeseplant on her head, almost touching the high ceiling. My mother's demureness had gone out the window and her arms were outstretched as she pushed her box pleated tweed skirt to the limit. My aunt held on to the Busy Lizzie with one hand and clutched the sherry glass in the other. We all stood on the landing, transfixed, before we began to laugh and the moment was gone.

We never saw Francy again as the romance broke up a year later. Paul is long gone and my daughter is now married to the boy from up the road which, as my mother said, was just as it should be. She had spread her wings and come back to build her own nest. Paul is married and living in London and has the most beautiful boy. He sent me a birthday card I still treasure, to the best 'almost mother-in-law' he ever had. Mum is gone now and auntie is near death's door, knocking on it but refusing to go in just yet. But in the wee small hours this morning, I could see the scene like it was yesterday and I laughed, almost as much as I did back then. And then I slept.