I have the appointment to go see my lawyer tomorrow.. THANK GOD.
So I'm more or less just using the blog to sort out my thoughts.
What I want the ultimate outcome to be...
I am awarded "physical primary custody" of minime. I make all responsible decisions in regards to her. period. including education, extra cirricular activities, medical care, etc.
Donor is awarded visitation under the stipulations of Friday to Sunday every other weekend. If he gets her at 6, then he has to return her to me by 6. and he has 2 non consecutive weeks during the summer, that will include his weekend.. meaning he's not getting his weekend PLUS another 7 days.
I retain mother's day, he gets father's day.
I get my birthday, he get's his. if it works for minime's schedule.
Easter, Christmas and Thanksgiving is split. one year I will have her until 2pm and he'll have her from 2 until 8. the next year we switch, with the exception that if I have her in the evening on said holiday I keep her.
Halloween, New year's eve/ new year's, her birthday, 4th of july, memorial day, labor day, (and any other's I can't think of right now) one year I have her, the next he will. here again regardless of who's weekend it is to have her.
Oh I can't forget to make sure I keep her for Memorial day '10.. she's in my best friends wedding ... SO CUTE!
I sit thru this torture until minime is old enough to decide for herself. OR donor finally realizes the pecking order and we can work it out regardless of court order.
as far as the child support half of it.. Whatever the worksheet says, goes. period. no more negotiating.. no more trying to make things easier on him. for example I have paid all her medical co pays since the original court order was established. I will continue to pay, except they will reimburse me the percentage set forth by the support order even if it's just a damn dollar. pay up asshole, I'm tired of making life easier on you.. (oops getting off on a tangent... )
that about sums it up for me at least.
I expect them to take me for joint custody, for the sole reason that it would open up a option for a different support worksheet, if they won. ultimately reducing the support considerably. This could also award them so many nights per year and allow them to claim the child tax credit. If this IS the case... the silver bullet WILL be used and I will have to take cover during the after math.
I'm 99% convinced that the silver bullet will show the courts that their home is unstable and extremely hostile at best, and everyone can witness the fall out of wifey's "step mother of the year" persona. as well as IF the silver bullet is used, I expect donor to retreat into himself and show mental instability. This silver bullet may even annihilate their marriage.
I really hope that I don't have to use the proverbial bullet. I've said this over a thousand times easily. I'm deep down just not that mean. My friends and family keep telling me... they are pushing you too. you have to use whatever means possible to protect yourself and your daughter. don't feel bad if you do have to reveal your dirty laundry. It happened for a reason, and you knew that reason going into it.. it's why you allowed it to happen like it did.
pray for tomorrow thoughtsters... I'll be back to report soon enough!
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