Hey again everyone! Hope you (and yeah, I'm talkin' to YOU).... are doin' good and feelin' fine.
Humanity, Apathy.... Humapathy.
Preface: I'm a former (but not retired) member of law enforcement. I've seen some of the most horrific things in our society. I left that about 9 years ago to move on with some more uplifting work. With that... on with my blog.
Yesterday, I noticed a 'ruckus' going on a few doors down from my house. An elderly woman was being yelled at by a man about age 25 to 30. This was 4th time I witnessed this in about a month.
I had made cautious attempts to 'intervene' without being too imposing. Maybe better expressed, each attempt, I went forward with the mindset of realizing these people are not my relatives or friends, and I needed to approach accordingly (for the sake of everyone, not just me.)
The first time I witnessed this commotion, I kept to myself. The 2nd and 3rd time, I started to walk over (this was out in the side walk area, each time)... and the elderly Aunt of this guy politely waved me away, as if she was saying - "It's okay, please don't get involved." So, same thing 2nd and 3rd time, and I nodded my head, turned around, and went back to my house.
4th time: Same commotion going on. This was just yesterday. I slowly approach. The 'guy' walks off into his Aunt's house before I even get close. The Aunt looks like she's about to cry, standing on the sidewalk... not waving me off this time.
I walk up and say; "If there is anything I can do to help, please let me know. I will do what I can. If not, I will pray for you in my own way, and leave."
"Yes. I would appreciate help. I'm just to embarrassed to ask, and I don't want to bother anyone with this." She further told me that due to neighbors complaining, the police came (some time ago) and eventually they gave him a trespass warning, and next time he shows up - its off to jail he goes. So, he couldn't come back to even sleep at his Aunt's (or simply even be there.)
Side note... the Aunt lives alone, no car, appears to be financially without, and seem(ed) fairly fragile. She is maybe around 70?
She's literally just about ready to cry... catches herself, and tells me, "Yes, please. Whatever you can offer, I'm ready. All his other relative live hours and hours away. And they all disowned him by now. He's burned all his bridges. I'm not able to help him.
I don't know what to do."
Turns out the guy is homeless and taking just about every illegal substance you can think of (literally.) And, without exaggeration, he looked like he is close to death. Honest. Only a few teeth left and those are rotten (from Meth, Coke, etc.) and he looked about 45 to me, and certainly had that homeless and hopeless look about him. He was only in his mid 20s.
Second side note: To the best of my knowledge, there has been NO physical aggression from 'this guy.' Just yelling, screaming, and being high, etc.
With the Aunt asking for help, I then stated, "Listen, I'll do what I can, but only if Tom (made up name) is willing to ask me for help. He needs to want it." She went inside, and they both came out within a minute. Tom calmly stuttered out a "Yes, I need help."
I felt it was my responsibility as a fellow human and a child of God (meaning, the God as I understand God) to at least offer help in whatever way I could without enabling the guy, such as giving money, a place to sleep in my house, and so forth. But I was willing to go to any length to get him into some kinda program, listen to him, let him vent, and drive him to meetings (he's homeless, no car, no job, etc.) Put all that together... allow him to find some comfort in someone. I'm not talking about a cure. I'm simply talking compassion and aiding someone within reason.
Interesting to note that he has a HUGE tattoo on him that says; "TRUST NO ONE"
So, with the Aunt's permission, and "Tom's" willingness, I drove him around... Let him talk (which he did plenty of), found a listing of all the AA / NA / CA meetings in town, etc., then I took the guy to some "AA" type meetings, drove him to a FREE long-term recovery program place, etc. But, they didn't have a bed for him for 4 days, and then I finally bought him some food (McDonalds.)
I then took him to, and sat in there with him, an "AA" related meeting at 5pm.
Note: He told me he couldn't do a 5pm AA meeting, because he had no where to sleep, and he'd have to be at one of the shelters in town by 6pm. He told me, "I've stayed in all of them. They lock the doors at 6pm, and they won't let anyone in. Once they lock those doors at 6, you can forget about it."
"Look, attending meetings is the priority for now. I'll get you into a shelter. Let me worry about that." He tried to argue with me, but I was adamant. We both sat through that 5pm meeting, and left around 6:15.
It being cold at night, I drove around to ALL the homeless shelters, and everyone turned 'me' down. As we drove around to these shelters, it was after 6pm.
His telling me that you can't get into a shelter unless you stand in line and get inside prior to 6pm, well, I found that hard to grasp, and I was going to go to every one in town until I found one, being determined that no one of us should ever have to sleep on the streets, no matter what their circumstance (or an unexplainable odd 6pm cut off time.)
The main (and only, as far as I know) homeless shelters in my area are CHURCHES. Houses of God.
The first two coldly (emphasis on coldly) told me that they would not let him in past 6pm. After pleading with each, "Nope, 6pm. Sorry." - then shut the door on me. I'm pretty sure at least one of them smiled when they flatly told me this. Okay, keep looking then, I thought.
Then I hit the third one, and was told the same. "Sorry, we lock the doors at 6pm."
I begged, and explained that I had taken this guy to two different AA related meetings that same day, that he was sober, and the second AA meeting started at 5pm. I also told him that I took him to a free recovery center, but they had no bed until maybe Friday.
"I took the risk when he didn't want to. I was confident that someone would allow him a few minutes late. Could you please make one exception for one person, someone who needs help, is cold, has no one, and just let him stay... please? He doesn't believe I can find a place for him to sleep tonight."
"Okay, tell you what," the man said... "If he can pass an alcohol breathalyzer, I'll do it for you. Where is he?"
"He's in my car, will you please wait one minute and I'll bring him to the door."
"Tom" passed the breath test, and had a good sleep. I met him this morning at 7 am, and took him to McDonalds as the Church provided no food.
He thanked me about 10 times, both for actually finding him a place to sleep, and for driving him around, his getting a good night sleep, and finally... getting some food in his stomach at McDonalds.
I assume he is back at that same shelter tonight. I told him I would meet him there Friday and take him out to the free recovery place. In the mean time, I gave him my phone number, and told him to call me anytime if he needed to talk.
That entire long story is to ask you a few questions, and share my thoughts.
1) Why do we, or more collectively, why does our United States of America, allow anyone to sleep on a street, when they need to be indoors. Especially those who actually want (need and want) to sleep there?
2) Why would a Church have a cut off time of 6 pm? Doesn't that seem kinda early? If space were the issue, that's no excuse in this case at least, because the 3rd church had plenty of room. I mean, why not a 8pm or 9pm cut off time? And the first two churches that coldly turned "Tom" away didn't say a word about being 'full' for the night.
3) While I realize some people are 'homeless' by CHOICE, due to NOT wanting help,
there are at least an equal number who WANT help, but either cannot locate help, cannot navigate the bureaucratic system, or simply didn't get to that shelter until 6:08 pm or 6:23 pm. Would you turn someone away if they were a few minutes late?
Here is the thing for me: There are Veterans of War who have sacrificed everything (their life, their mental and physically well-being), other folks in wheel-chairs, and many of these folks receive such little assistance. I know this for a fact, due to a relative of mine. There are elderly people, folks in the 70s and 80s (or more) that have no family (for whatever reason)... and some of them are homeless. Families are homeless, as in 'with children.'
Why are so many homeless?
Except for those homeless 'by choice'... how can we collectively allow anyone to be homeless?
Is it apathy?
What is apathy? I found one definition I like: 1. The absence of interest in, care of, or enthusiasm for things generally considered outside of ourselves or not immediately affecting oneself."
Are we maybe simply too comfortable on our computers, getting those new BluRay DVDs, having two cars, and getting the latest iPod? The latest cell phone that just came out? Well, I could go on. The point is... is it simply that we're just to busy being comfortable in our own homes? You know... if it doesn't affect ME, well, screw it. (???)
Are we just desensitized to it. You see it so much, after a while, you don't care?
Another point or thought I have about this:
If we can spend billions for bank bail-outs, and we can have billions in the "American Recovery Package" (or, maybe better known as The American Recovery and Reinvestment Act of 2009 ), is there not a good sum available in there to build more shelters?
Building more shelters means JOBS for those to build them, and then maybe even JOBS for people to WORK in/at them. You can hire builders, therapists to work inside, clergy, job assistant workers, cleaning staff, etc. And, guess what... less homeless on the streets. Hmmm.
Maybe help some of these folks... and then maybe some (emphasis on some) of them going on to help with Habitat for Humanity, or building new shelters (new Churches), and going on the eventually help the economy? You know... receiving help and comfort, and to then provide for others in need?
I'm not left wing or right wing. I'm not trying to make a political statement.
It simply disturbs me that we spend more of our taxes on wars, bank bailouts, building prisons (and then the cost to keep em locked up)... not to mention extreme political salaries (and political campaigns) than we do on the physically ill, mentally ill, and our elderly.
It's disturbs me that I had to beg 3 churches to let a homeless person in, and be turned away simply because 'we' (him) were a few minutes late.
As for anyone thinking giving folks a free ride (or 'socialism')... let me just say that we already have FREE libraries, FREE community centers, FREE education until college, FREE parks, many FREE National Parks, etc. So, you can read books for free, but you can't sleep in the church? You can get your high school diploma for free, but you can't sleep in a church or shelter? Yeah - that makes a lot of sense.
Well, you know, nothing is free. We all pay for all these thing via taxes. And as for those who are medically or mentally ill, we all pay FICA, which in part eventually does go to help those in need. Socialism? In my opinion, it's a wash, because we ALL pay for everything via taxes and FICA. So, we get all these things 'free' via paying taxes. You pay now or later. You don't help the addict or homeless, you pay when some go to jail and prison. One way or another, we all pay.
So why are elderly people, families, Veterans, and so many others homeless?
Don't think it's important? Go spend two or three nights sleeping out in the streets.
Here's something to think about: A former high ranking member of the British Parliament was being interviewed on a well respected and long running 'serious' television show.
He was asked about what he thought about 9/11 and how the USA has done since then, in general. (Note, this man was in the British Parliament during WWII.)
I watched and listened in amazement when he made the statement in his interview:
"The United Stated was hurt during 9/11, and 3,000 people died. The only other time something of that magnitude happened was a good 60 years ago. In World War II, we had our 9/11 just about every day, for several years. London was bombed almost daily for four years. When it was all over, our Government took the time to examine and realize that if we could remain strong through that, and afford to fight that war for four years, we sure as hell can afford to rebuild, give everyone free health care and other critical necessities. If we could get through that, we can get through anything. Together."
When I heard him say that, I was speechless. Literally. Wow, what a statement.
How many nights could you sleep on the streets starting tomorrow. And who would care? Besides your family, would anyone even notice?
Is it apathy? Any thoughts?
Thanks for reading.
Shawn / NoMoreHeat aka Screaming Loudly
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