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Johnny Bravo: Hey, there, hot mama, you wouldn't happen to be hiding a gorilla under them clothes, would you?
got a call from La Don about 30 minutes ago asking if I wanted to go with a bunch of them to the lakehouse that Zeke's parents own this weekend. I'm thinking about going. But during the conversation it made me realize all the shit I put up with from this group of guys. How is it that I'm constantly the one getting picked on? And this conversation made me realize that my friends suck. Not really...but yea, they do.
"Hey Noah, want to come to the lake for the weekend with 'The Crew'? Big party, man!"
"I don't know, I'll have to think about it."
"Come on man, you can bring your ark and it'll be a boat party!"
Alright, I understand my name is Noah and that dude in the Bible had an ark. Get over it! I've known ya'll since I was 14 and it still doesn't get old? I always just shrug it off and give them a big loud "Kiss my ark" or sometimes even "Oh right, that reminds me, the lions are out of food. Come on buddy, you'd make a great snack for them." Or in this case...
"If I remember correctly, and since I'm Noah I'm pretty sure I do, only Noah's family is allowed on the ark. The rest of you are just going to have to drown."
"Man, I'm your brotha from another motha!"
"Sorry, that's the rules."
"Alright, alright, no ark. If you come, I will personally make sure Zeke leaves the knife at home."
"How're you gonna do that Don, he's twice your size?"
"You're right. Dude, you might just have to deal with being threatened a few times."
Ah, the wonderful little pocketknife. The only way Zeke can get me to shut up if he's losing an argument with me. The knife is his leverage. Lol. It's funny how a fear that's his fault is that most amusing thing to him. So, here's a run down. I was stabbed January 2007 and then January of 2008 I was cut by a knife. Each time leaving me in a bloody mess. So, I have bad luck with knives and a slight fear of them. And my wonder friends think it's hilarious. When I told D-Roc that Brad punched me, his answer was "Knowing your luck, I'm surprised he didn't have a knife."When I get into an argument with Zeke that he knows he's going to lose, he pulls out his knife and says "I'll slice you up, mother fucker." The first time I got stabbed it was Zeke's fault and he still thinks it's funny.
"Alright man, just call me tomorrow and let me know if you're going. See ya, shorty"
Hung up the phone and shook my head, I hate those name that people give you that are complete opposite of what you really are. Like when people call me "shorty" or "tiny". Guys, I'm 6'4. I honestly don't mind the "How's the weather up there" comments. But...shorty? I can't come up with a good comeback for that. Give me something I can work with people. |
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Posted by noahseth on 2008-06-25 15:40:35 | Rating: | Views: 94
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I get shorty a lot, but I am 5'1".
Maybe you should think about not going in order to prevent any future stabbings. It's not funny I know, but your bad luck with the knives was a little humorous.
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Posted by KarKar
on 2008-06-25 16:04:59
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I would be dumping them for the weekend. and spending it with mandy and TC.
Now that sounds like a better weekend.
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Posted by KP
on 2008-06-25 16:25:23
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I agree with KP! Does Mandy own a knife? I rather like them myself.
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Posted by anotherdaze
on 2008-06-25 18:12:32
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KarKar-It's a little different when people call you "shorty" and you're actually short. Lol.
KP-Mandy works on Saturdays. I'm sure the 3 of us could do something once she gets out of work. I'm still debating on what I'm going to do.
Anotherdaze-Hm, if she does own I knife, I sure hope she doesn't use it on me. Hope she likes me just a little more than that.
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Posted by noahseth
on 2008-06-25 18:21:24
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wow. lol men....
anyways. what's zeke scared of? there's gotta be something....and a knife fear isn't really a huge thing to joke about but then again, men. you are a quick witted young man so just kill him with your comebacks and if the whip the knife out then like I said find thier fears.
and the shorty thing, I don't even want to hear it...I'm 5'2", whether I am shory or not it still sucks to be called it day in and day out lol....at least you aren't short or as Easy says "vertically challenged"
:)
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Posted by Katydids_and_daisies
on 2008-06-25 18:31:31
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Hey Noah - why not come back with ... "So what does that make you?" when they call you shorty.
And another - where the hell these guys been??? The lease on the Ark is now with Evan ... "Evan Almighty", but i like your come back telling them they'll drown cause only family is allowed, and kiss my ark.
Knife fear, well thats real and justifiable. Hmm not really a joking matter.
Guys do alot of shit hanging don't they? but they always have, it hides their real affection for each other .... oh sorry I mean their Male Bonding sessions..... :)
Hey and I agree with KP & Angie - STAY HOME with MANDY and TC!!!! :)
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Posted by EasyToSay
on 2008-06-25 20:32:46
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I dated a Noah forever in high school. His SN was "arkman2000." Brought me back... funny post! And I get called... "Blondie" but... alas... I am a complete, natural blonde. ...so I like it. ha ha
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Posted by TheAlreadyJaded
on 2008-06-25 21:22:08
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next time he calls you shorty tell him you would call him Tiny... but that is to close to the truth so you have to call him biguns... and if someone gives you a strange look just tell them,"Hey it's not my fault... it's the nick name the guys on the prison work crew gave him.... "
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Posted by DouglasMB
on 2008-06-27 13:35:33
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