The past few days have been somewhat crappy for me. I was in a pretty good mood Friday night. I went out with my friends; which normally doesn’t happen on Friday nights because I have to work on Saturday mornings. Anyway, we went to the same place we always go to…our favorite sports bar. Jason and Kimmy were getting along pretty well for once. I didn’t say too much to Jason in the beginning of the night, because I wasn’t too happy with him. Well, a bunch of us went out to have a smoke (Kimmy stayed in since she doesn’t smoke) and our friend, Dan, asked Jason why he wasn’t chain smoking like he normally does. Jason replied that he was trying to behave since he treated his girlfriend like shit last weekend. I couldn’t contain myself any longer, so I said, “Yeah, you did treat her like shit. I told her to break up with you.” He got mad and told me it was none of my business, and I told him that I’m not going to sit there and say nothing when he treats her the way he did last weekend. Our friends, Dan and Tom, slowly backed out of the conversation while Jason and I went a couple more rounds. Obviously, Jason knew I was right, because he didn’t stay mad at me for long. That’s the type of relationship we have though. We’ll get mad at each other, let each other know if one is being an asshole or a bitch, and get over it. I appreciate it when people are honest with me, and let me know if I’m in the wrong. I absolutely hate fake people. Anyway, later on in the night Kimmy started nagging Jason. I am going to vouch for him, he was doing nothing wrong. He was in a good mood, being nice to Kimmy, and just being goofy. I could tell he was getting irritated when he asked me if I would go have a smoke with him. We went outside and he complained to me that he was trying his hardest to be nice to her, but she yells at him for being himself and acting goofy. I told him that she could still be upset about last weekend, because I know I would still be hurt by his actions if it were me. I also told him to just wait until tomorrow and talk to her about it. He told me he has talked to her about it, but it doesn’t help. All I could tell him was that they are going to have to either compromise and work with each other, or decide if all this trouble is worth it. He agreed with me. What has freaked me out a little though was that for most of the time he was complaining, I found myself wondering what it would be like to kiss him. I have thought about it before, many times, but only after I have been drinking. I honestly, would never, ever follow through with my thoughts. I am not the type of girl to do that to her friend….even though Kimmy has done it to me before. But that was so long ago, and I could care less now. Anyway, I could never do that to Kimmy, and I don’t even think I’m attracted to Jason. I know I would never date him, so I don’t know what the deal is with me thinking about kissing him. Another weird thing that happened the weekend before was when Kimmy and Jason began to fight; I was standing near Jason and whispered to him to be nice to her. He then whispered in my ear a bunch of complaining, I wasn’t listening or understanding half of it, but I could have sworn he whispered, “I know you want me” in the midst of everything else he was saying. I pulled away, and said, “What?!” but he just ignored me. I didn’t know what to think after that, so I just pretended that I didn’t hear what I think I heard.
The rest of the night was somewhat irritating, but I was too drunk to really care all that much. I stayed at my friend, Dan’s house with his g/f, Jill (whom I have also known since freshman year of high school), our friend Tom, and another mutual friend, Brett. I don’t like to drink and drive, so I’ll stay at someone’s house rather than risk driving home. Jill was pretty drunk, and started a really stupid fight with Dan. So I had to hear that for a good hour. When she finally passed out, I tried to get some sleep, but the boys were being loud and rowdy. They finally shut up around 4:30am…..I had to be up at 7:30. I woke up at 6 dying of heat in the room, and just laid there until 7:30 trying to fall back to sleep. I went to work feeling just tired, but glad I wasn’t hung-over.
At work, one of my bosses, Carol, pulled me aside to tell me about the position I applied for a couple weeks ago. She told me that they weren’t going to promote me for it, because they decided to make it a part-time position. I was very disappointed, I still am. It doesn’t make sense to me, because I would be perfect for the job. They are now hiring some old biddy who wants to retire soon. She is strictly a part-timer, refuses to work full time, and has worked there before. Carol told me that they switched it to part time, because it has been slow…….it’s always slow this time of year though! I asked her what was going to happen when it becomes busy again in the spring, and she told me she didn’t know. They want to send me to training and classes for the position so I could apply elsewhere if something became available. I don’t have time to sit and wait for something to come up, my loans start in June. I need a good, full-time job as soon as possible. So for the rest of the weekend, I sulked and looked for jobs. I have a degree, there is a lot I can do, but I don’t even know where to begin. It’s very overwhelming. I think I’m going to go into work on my day off tomorrow and talk to the big boss, Alice, about the whole situation. It is going to bother me until I speak my mind about it. I am going to state my case, and if they don’t reconsider I will ask her to at least write a letter of recommendation for me, since I will be looking for another job.
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