i'm so angry right now i want to vomit.  i'm sick of being subjected to lies and dancing.  even worse when they're the same tired, worn-out lines and steps that have been so thoroughly destroyed by previous analyses.  tears don't change the truth so don't bother.  and why should i have to scream "leave!" upwards of thirty times before the command in followed?  only someone who knows i won't hurt them would refuse me in my current state, and such a person would have to know that they once held the center of my heart.  even worse, then, that they should attempt to persuade me, someone who loved them wholly and completely, with unadulterated, PREVIOUSLY CONFIRMED, bullshit.  yes, i see how much you love me that even now you will continue to lie in order to make yourself into something only a hairs-breadth less villanous.  fuck you.

what really, really sucks is that earlier today, lonely as it was, wasn't terrible.  i bought a silly gift, and that made me feel pretty good.  and now it's ruined.  and my stomach burns.  and my shirt is sticking too me from sweat.  and my head aches.  and everything just fucking sucks ass.