Even though I didn't know this girl well I still woke up thinking of her.  Well maybe not her but the situation.  I wonder why, I didn't know her that well, she had traits that I wouldn't 'choose'.  She was not the one, if it was meant to be it would have been.  So why am I giving it so much thought?  Why am I giving up some of my finite amount of time for something that has happened.  Surely this is a waste of my life.  But still I continue. 

I could and probably should put it down to good experience.  It was the first dates that I have had for about 6 years, the likelyhood of it ending happily ever after was pretty slim.  Maybe it's my optimistic outlook and my secret egarness to be percieved as a good guy.  Ask me face to face and I will tell you that what other people think of me isn't important, it's what you think of yourself that matters.  I would like to believe this but dont seem to be able to commit to it fully. 

More later.