Tomorrow afternoon is our scheduled marriage counseling session. I am nervous and scarred just thinking about it. I really don't know what to expect... Is she going to be there? is she not going to be there?..... I really don't know....

I think she is afraid of coming back to the grumpy version of me. She has been avoiding me, and we haven't been talking since she moved out 2 weeks ago. But since my sleep apnea surgery, I felt like a new man. All these years of body ache and tiredness, an one our surgery took care of it all. How can I assure her that my grumpy self is gone........ I drove her back in her hard shell, how can I get my message through to her.....I want to be happy, and I want to be happy with her, and I know she will be happy with me again if she gives me another chance.....

I may have been a grumpy person, but I always loved her. Aside from my old grumpy self, I think she is afraid that I am going to make her live with my family.....I love my family, but I don't like them... Living with them is something that I don't plan to do. I have seen damages done in my family, especially with my uncle in NJ and my aunt in RI. Having parents living with you put a lot of stresses on marriage, and may break it apart. I will do everything in my power to not let this happen, but how can I assure her...........

Now, all of the issues that we have are in the open. I know exactly what she wants in the marriage. And honestly, it is what I want as well. I am not giving up what I want just to be with her. If what she wants is what I want, then, isn't this our common goal for the future. I really hope she sees it. She is my partner in life. I will not do anything that she is not approve of. 

I know she wants out because she is afraid, but how can I assure her there is nothing to be afraid of......