*venting*

my father is a piece of work. if he's not playing games with his mom, it's me, or one of the kids. my poor kids are all screwed up. he's forever talking shit about me to them. oh, i am sooo pissed at him right now!

he's taken it to a whole new level! the night before, after i went to bed he starts in on my bf. he tells him, "i noticed you guys have been fighting more lately. i just wanted you to know, that i think your a good guy and we're friends. and if you guys break up down the line, i want you to know that your still welcome here and you can have your computer."

first of all, who the hell says we are breaking up? just cuz we fight? all couples fight! then about my bf's computer. it's his! he put it together with all of his own stuff. how the hell is my father going to give him permission to keep his own computer?

then he goes on to say a bunch of stuff about me. how i'm not doing this and i'm not doing that. when am i going to start paying my $500/month in rent. omg! i have been paying it. just not like he wants me too. i know what my father is up too. he's ticked cuz i'm not carrying the family finacially. i shouldn't have too. i'm family for God's sake!

my father tells my bf that he can't talk to me about it cuz i get mad when he does. damn right i do! i'm not some 5 yo child who needs to be yelled at cuz that's what he does. my bf said "look, your not going to talk to her. can't you see that she's sick right now? or are you too worried about your daughter's money that you don't care to see? i have to come up with the money to take her to the dr's. so, no, your not going to say a thing to her. and i don't care about what you have to say. all you do is whine all day about 'woe is you' and i'm tired of it. i don't care anymore."

so my father takes it to a whole new level. he tells him that his best friend from W VA. called him and told my father the 'real' reason he went home early from his visit here. supposedly, "he left early cuz he didn't like seeing you take all my customers and trying to take over my business." WTF!! i'm sure that's not what his friend said. cuz he told us that he was leaving cuz his friend is a fat sack of shit! he told us that he made plans to hang out with him and all he did was sleep the whole time! that he left his customers hanging and he was glad that my bf was there to pick up the slack. we told him why my father lost the shop and he was really pissed about it cuz i think he had some money invested in it too. i do know that he paid off one of his bills for him. cuz he never paid his rent and he never paid the phone or electric bill. we gave him money to do it. that's why he lost his business. but he sat here telling my bf that he's the reason why my father lost the business cuz his friend told him so. so now my bf feels like shit. cuz my father had the nerve to tell him it was his fault instead of taking responsibility for his own faults. he's he one who ran himself outa business. no one else.

then he goes on this long thing about each of my kids. finally my bf told him to shut the hell up. that he was tired of hearing him whine and cry about his problems. told him that it's all he does and he's sick of hearing "oh, woe is me." told him again that he didn't care and if he has to hear it one more time he's going to kick his ass. told him it's not his fault the two of us can't seem to get along. well, my father seems to think that since my bf has been in the picture, he can't use me like he used to do. that's why he thinks it's my bf fault. hell, i'm 36 yo and my father seems to think i'm still 5 and he has a right to use and boss me around. when is he gonna get that he walked out on me when i was 8. yea i needed some help and he helped me. but at what price? we are slaves here. when we leave all of his work won't get done and he'll have to do it all.

i don't know what to do. i need to get outa here but i'm outa money thanks to my father and his neediness. i'm out $5000 within 3 mons. i'm broke and have no place to go. my father is fricken psycho.

last night my father got into a fight with my 13 yo. he was trying to show her the "propper way to scrub a pan with a choreboy". she said she knew cuz her mom showed her how. he got all pissed off and they started fighting. over a freakin choreboy!!! he had the nerve to tell me that if she ever talks to him like that again that she will be the reason we are kicked out. i said "why? cuz you let her talk to you like that? put your foot down!! don't let her do it to you!" he says "what? am i wrong here?" i told him, no one was telling him he was wrong, just to put his foot down and don't let her do it. he gets sooo pissed and says "i'm gone!" like it's going to effect us. it don't effect us anymore. so we told him "see ya!"

he comes back like 15 mins. later demanding that she go inside with him. he gives her a freaking 4 hour lecture on why she can't do that and how her mother is all wrong and he's right. hahahahaha. petty, childish, bullshit.

she comes out here and he embarrasses her by making her tell me why she blew up at him. i told her i didn't care, the fight was between him and her. i'm thinking, why should i have to be told lies that he convinced her to say. but he made this huge point to bother me with it. so she told me how it was all her fault. it wasn't. how is it her fault when all she said was "mom showed me how to do it and just cuz it's not your way doesn't mean it's wrong." she's was actually right and made her think that she's wrong.

but i know what it was really about. my father is jealous cuz she gets to meet her father for the first time tomorrown and she invited my bf to come instead of inviting him. like i said, fricken psycho.