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promise or work?

good news is i'm in
well maybe it was because i gave too many promises that i now regret making because i feel that at the current state i'm unable to keep them
people always make time management sound so easy
am i really that bad at it?
i tried to slot in the things properly but some how or rather everything just overlaps....
it always happen this way....
when there's no news, there's practically nothing at all
but when one good news comes, others would fight for your attention as well...
the thing about this is that initially when i applied, i would not know what my chances are...
anything can happen...
you might get nothing at all or you might get everything that you wish for...
well right now i'm in the later case...
and it's really very difficult to give up any of the options....
all of them are important to me and i can manage all of them within the time frame if i had not given my promise that i would be able to attend all the sessions
now it makes no sense....
whether i withdraw or stay committed, i would be breaking my promise and this is the last thing that i would want to happen....
i hate people who break their promise so i would want to keep mine....
should i just pretend that nothing happened and just go on with everything until something crops up? but that would be even more irresponsible...
i have been losing sleep over how to deal with this situation lately....
school or leisure?
money or promise?
i can't decide...
i don't want those people to think badly of me....
what if all of them can attend except me?
it makes no sense if i don't go and don't know those people inside right?
missing out on the first session is not a wise decision....
i really wanted to go on the day pf publicity but i guess i can't because i have already agreed to work....
i'll give myself some more time to think and act tonight....
or should i tell them and if they say that it is impossible then i withdraw?
should draw lots again....

sometimes i wonder how imressionable can a person be?
i guess i'm that kind that you would not remember after the first glance...
maybe people who are really close and know me well would....
just happen to chance upon some stuff that was put up by my friends whom i know long ago...
actually i wonder if they would remember me like how i remembered them....
i guess maybe not....
after all i'm lke an invisible statue....
it's easy to forget like how people forget me nowadays....
sometimes it kind of hurt to know that you are this kind of person
but i guess after a while you sort of get used to it....
sometimes i thank god that i'm like this
because it would be easier for you to leave without a trace without having to worry about anyone else because no one else would worry about you....

Posted by milo on 2009-06-09 01:53:22 | Rating: