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| A DAY IN A BLACK WOMAN'S WORLD |
A DAY IN A BLACK WOMAN'S WORLD
What about the N word?
My first time on redgage. Like all first times it's not knowing that causes the suspense. I want to share my experience and perhaps, there is a minute chance that you may understand the black experience. Some may call it the African American experience. Here is a glimpse inside of a black persons world...my world... A DAY IN A BLACK WOMAN'S WORLD
I am the stereo typical black woman. Single because I separated myself away from my husband. I have lots of kids and I am unemployed.
It's what I experienced first hand. Any way, this is what happened to me the other day.
I thought prejudice was gone, Yes I know the stigma is still here but I didn't think I was going to ever experience prejudice first hand, my older family members told me about things that they had to live with, I didn't think I. I didn't think I would ever smell the stench of it...I prefer to call prejudice narrow mindedness.
It was Sunday, I went to get a cake for family day, which I do once a month on a Sunday with all six of my seven children. I picked up the cake, "happy family day" was written on it per my request. I went to the cash register, feeling good inside. I was about to spend time playing with my grand children and laughing and talking to my children. My oldest Valerie, who I adopted when she was seven, now she's 31. Valerie is all of 119 pounds, 5'0 tall she has a caramel skin tone, she's the comedian of the family, recently she had her breast enlarged, from flat to a c cup, she has 1 daughter named after herself at my request. Valerie jr. is 12. My oldest son is Anthony 27, golden brown skin, 6 foot even, clean shaven with a black beard and mustached, he is very clean cut in every form of thwe word. He does not use any vulgar langue, no smoking or drinking, Anthony his owns his home. He purchased it when he turned 21, he has 2 boys, Deon 9 and Richeous whose 4. Then there is Sharita 5'10, about to be 23, She is my beautifully chocolate complexioned one, everyone says she should be a model, she has no noticeable stomach area, her face chiseled features. Sharita has a snappy attitude and won't bite her tongue will tell anyone where to get off, in no uncertain way, no children everyone's children loves her. Charles 20, medium brown skin tone, mustache and light beard 6'2'' the artist he has creative hands, he use to make dinosaurs animal figures from aluminum foil, and he draws everything. Charles has one baby boy 14 months, named Zimmer, we call him Z- man. Malvin 19, the tallest of all my children is 6' 7 brown caramel colored, groomed facial hair, he is a genius on the computer, he is a music producer, no children. Jessie the youngest 18, I don't know what happened to Jessie his mind is not right, but he likes to write lyrics and rap, he is quite the performer. He makes CD's of himself and sells them door to door.
Any way, I paid for my cake and got the receipt, I was walking out of a popular grocery store, my cake in hand, I was a few feet behind the plump gentleman, as he walked through the plastic security gate, the alarm sounded, now I have not entered the area, I stopped and waited a couple of secondsvthen preceded to enter the alarm area. The lady greeter, stopped and the plump gentleman stopped at the door in front of me, The lady greeter said nothing to the guy who caused the alarm to go off. She approached me. 60ishs, hair mostly gray wirer, wearing thick glasses, she approaches me, says "I need to see your receipt", I wanted to say, I know your glasses are thick but Stevie wonder could see I didn't set it off the alarm, instead I stood there feeling like I was in the dirty south, she made me feel like I was covered in excrement and buzzards were circling and she was going in for the kill. I replied, carefully and politely, I didn't set it off he did." and I pointed to the plump gentleman in front of me, who stood there and stood there because he knew he caused it and without a receipt in his hand, she insisted that I show my receipt, I did and as I walked toward the door, the plump gentleman exited, right then I decided not to go back to that store. The next day I found myself at the same store, I thought anybody could have a bad day, may be it wasn't at all as I had thought. unbelievable, the same thing happened. After that, I decided not to go to that that store any more. Any way, needless to say the guy in front of me was of the white persuasion both times. Ouch that hurts!
What about the N word?
I saw an eleven year black boy on TV the other day, talking about banning the N word. I wanted to talk to him, maybe I would be able to put a spin on the N word for him, may be cause him to see the N word differently. I wanted to get him to understand the N. I would explain to him. See the N word back in the day, was used to make black people feel less that than human to down grade them. And some hateful people are still trying. Let's take the N word off of the degrading list! Now days teens, hip hop people and my friends use the N word in a positive and very loosely. Youngsters use the N word as terms of endearment. To be honest, to me it still has a nasty kick. When I use to hear my children say it, I'd think, "I hope their friends don't call them the N word." being that some of them are not African American. I use to tell my children to stop saying that the N word,. One day I asked my children, What if one of your white friends called you that?" the answer was, Mama, "they already do...we all do...my Mexican friends...my white friends...Italian...Egyptian...Greek and my Jewish friends - but we don't say Jew, it's Jewish, but we all refer to ourselves and each other by calling each other the N word." at first I was appalled, a white person calling one of my children the N word. It took time before I could comprehend. I can't say it feels ok but I understand. And right now, I say how ever they want to use it is alright with me, because they use it in a positive way. Now the N word is losing it's KICK...POWER...it's STING. And I say that's good mania. The N word should not be band. Every body is using it...all nationalities are calling them selves the N word. Today it's cool to be a N. WHAT'S UP MY N? And I mean that with the greatest respect possible. Peace and one love! MY N!
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