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| Insecurities creeping in...
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I was never one for being insecure...I shouldn't say that, I don't know how to explain it....I have never really cared what I look like physically, to be honest, I like me...I don't know if that comes across conceited, but I'm not trying to be. I guess I'm comfortable with who I am. If you don't like me, that's on you...and that's the attitude I've always had. But lately, something has gotten a hold of me. This is my attempt to fix myself.
If you're a size 7 and you stand next to a size 0 or 2, you feel much bigger. Even though you're really not, I guess your mind plays tricks on you. And I never really understood anorexia and bulumia. I can never starve myself...and I hate throwing up when I'm sick so I could never make myself throw up. But I guess karma's kicking me in the ass, giving me a little taste of what it feels like. I am starting to pick out flaws in my body that I used to love. But let's really get in there, these size 0 women are who my husband is surrounded by. And this is where the major insecurity is coming in. And I don't know why. I have never had a problem with my husband not wanting me. Most of the time, we can't keep our hands off each other, so I know that he's attracted to me, but it's not necessarily prettier, thinner, etc., sometimes men want something different. I know that he loves me and I am his wife, and I shouldn't be having these feelings. I have accepted who I was a long time ago, so why these feelings all of a sudden?
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Posted by LuckyLuci on 2008-06-27 17:54:10 | Rating: | Views: 130
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I think that honestly a size 7 is sexier than a 0. And aren't you happier because you allow yourself to eat? Some skinny bitches are so rude because they are so dang hungry! As long as your healthy your good. And don't pick on yourself. Men will always be tempted by something better, but as long as you have confidence in yourself it will last longer than someone else's looks!
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Posted by KarKar
on 2008-06-27 18:06:08
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hey luci, I know sometimes it cant be helped, these feelings we have that we dont compare to others, or maybe we're not seen as.. desirable as the others are, shake it though. You write about a great guy, a guy you love and who loves you, and you just wrote how you know he wants you, men do know a good thing when they have it. those girls who say we dont, just weren't the good thing he wanted. from the little picture I see of you you're a hottie (course I have a thing for eyes) and I dont think the size 0 miss fake thing would do for a man who's had a real woman. no worries doll, its just the darkness creeping in, tell it to go away, you're beautiful, and he loves you and wants you. be strong. ttyl
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Posted by tonyrayhutchison
on 2008-06-27 18:06:25
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karkar, lol! thanks for making me laugh...i am happy and lucky that i really never had many issues with my body. and that i could eat...:) but, i know its all in my head, it's just harder to get it out of the there...
Tony, what can I say? Your words are so sweet and thank you :) It's nice to hear a guy say that "men do know a good thing when they have it." That gives me confirmation because that's what my husband says. I know you guys get a bad rep, but I know there's some really good ones. and I'm positive I have a good one, but no one is perfect. and your right, it's the darkness creeping in, that's why I try to keep myself laughing...but it is hard...i gotta get passed this...and you folks are helping...:)
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Posted by LuckyLuci
on 2008-06-27 19:06:45
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Luci just be you. Thank God we are all different shapes, sizes and colors. Keeps life more interesting.
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Posted by pitapie50
on 2008-06-27 20:41:42
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No matter how confident or secure we are in ourselves, sometimes those nagging doubts still manage to sneak in between the cracks. Believe me, I know.
Believe in yourself, and in your husband, and you'll come fine. <3
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Posted by MorganKnight
on 2008-06-27 22:22:31
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Nice to meet you, Morgan:) First sight of you here.
Lucy, you don't have any splaining to do:P
Your insecurities would be more founded if they were more particular maybe. I see spots on my face and body that I don't like...I see my hair thinning before I am "old"... Of course a woman with a gut dating a guy who is buff is going to be self-conscious if he is around models. But, you don't have that problem, Im sure. So, it's a bit "superficial" to worry so. Yes, some women are just fine--if not hotter--with a lil meat on them:P
[Covering my ears/eyes on the rest though:P I dont need to see the bedroom.]
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Posted by brainstormer
on 2008-06-27 23:53:22
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You are who he wants, keep him reminded of why ;) But,know what? Aggressive women who target your mate are not usually the pretty ones you worry about. Keep your eye on the plain, the overlooked. The actually homely.Those are the needy,the ones who feel they are entitled,or have something to prove.
Men and thier wives,don't feel they are a threat, and may let them get too close.
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Posted by circe
on 2008-06-28 02:01:28
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Luci, you are awesome, and when you feel a bit insecure, put on your 6 inch heels and dance to that song that he likes! :)
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Posted by EasyToSay
on 2008-06-28 06:56:46
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Luci I loved the comment you left on my post... Think of those women your husband sees everyday. It's not like most normal men who pass by a really good looking woman and wonder hum... He is around them all the time, its like eating the same food over and over and over..... Blah what was your favorite you can not longer stomac. He know how fake they are, knows thier lives all allabout how they look... then he has you to come home to. You are real, your heart is big, you are beautiful both inside and out and he can see that. Would you trade a good solid man for one who is skin deep that look like a god? Nah... and neither will he. You are fine and what your feeling is normal... so like easy said... if you want to make your self feel better? Throw on like an apron or something with heels on and nothing else, let him come home to you washing dishes but ass nakes with an apron and heels. And really pay attention to his expression. You will see the love, lust, want, and desire he holds for you. Then watch him the next day as he watched TV or reads a mag and sees a beautiful woman, you will see the difference.
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Posted by DouglasMB
on 2008-06-28 10:18:08
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Zero isn't a fargin' SIZE!!! I remember when being called a "zero" meant you had nothing going for you! Besides, I'm sure your man quit playing with stick figures a long time ago! ....oh sorry...zoned out there for a second...was mezmerized by Sean Connery...sigh...Where was I??
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Posted by BootLady
on 2008-06-28 15:39:25
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hey, luci. Im a size 2 but im feeling the same way that you do.
Sizes doesnt matter, its how we reach out to our partners. Im struggling in this kind of situation right now but its all about understanding with each other. Our physical relationships changes but not emotionally. =) if you know what I mean. Keep it cool.
men are like that I guess.
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Posted by vhegga
on 2008-06-28 22:04:07
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Pita, ;) I feel you on that.
Morgan, hello :) and thank you. "Nagging doubts," I like the way you put it. :)
brainstormer, I got my eyes on you, I read the comment you left me in HFFP :P :)
circe, you continue to wow me with your comments :) thank you
Easy, I should go dust them off, but I'm tellin ya, maximum 2 hour time limit...OUCH! :) thanks
Doug, thank you :) me and u see eye to eye on this one...I've actually done the whole naked with an apron on thing, but you've reminded me, I did tell him that I wanted to get a ninja outfit and sneak up on him, only for him to rip my mask off and find out its a girl...this could be arranged...:)
Boot, lmao! u crack me up :) thank you. and yes I did manage to get hypnotized by sean connery for a sec there...:)
vhegga, thank you...that is very nice of you. :)
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Posted by LuckyLuci
on 2008-06-28 23:02:21
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I'm in college and I wear size "beer belly". Sometimes people tell me that I should "eat healthier". Often times, my response is "fuck off". I can only assume that this would be as fun for you as it is for me.
I guess what I'm saying is that eating the food that you want brings a certain joy that really nothing else in life can bring. Sacrificing that joy is not something that anyone should do to shave off a few pounds.
p.s. curvy women will always be more attractive than "the carpenter's best friend" (flat as a board and easy to nail).
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Posted by JBP
on 2008-06-29 02:08:32
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lmmfao JB! You are great :)
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Posted by LuckyLuci
on 2008-06-29 23:21:56
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