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| I want everyone to be honest.
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Here is want I want to know...Are relationships really worth the trouble once you finally find one that seemingly *works*? I have searched high and low for a guy that can tolerate me and I can tolerate him. Seems like anything past a few years fizzles. Relationships start with, "I love you" then evolve into "I love you but..." then the turn into I loved you. I am really afraid of being in another relationship only to find out the guy that is "so into me" isn't after all, or turns out he is into other girls too or some rediculousness. It all boils down to a fear, a fear of the fact that if I trust someone even at a basic level like...lets say...just talking that they will let me down, and usually there is no indication, just a random rug out from under you thing that takes place somewhere in the get to know you process. I just don't want the rug to get pulled out from under me but it keeps happening, which I know is lifes way of telling me to just not date right now. Maybe the guy I am suppose to be with is experiencing the same thing or maybe not, maybe he doesn't even exist. At any rate I am over it. Here is the thing, I don't want kids and all guys want freaking kids so usually when that comes up guys change...they are like oh you were the perfect girl until you said that. Its not a definate thing, but its solidified enough that I can't make a promise that it will change you know. So that puts me in some strange threatening undatable catagory I suppose..... she likes sex but won't procreate...weirdo! Its funny because guys act like they don't want to date women that already have kids, but they don't want to date a girl that doesn't want them either. MEN! I just want some opinions here if you come across this blog. What the hell do men want? What the hell should women be looking for? And if you are in a relationhship, Do you like it? Is being in one worth the trouble and if it is....WHY? Seriously , I really want to know.
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Posted by lovecrasher on 2008-08-21 23:08:12 | Rating: | Views: 74
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Now a days men want everything they can get. Most men only care when the relationship is going good. When it seems to be going down hill they run and find someone else. There are good ones out there just be patient.
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Posted by prettywoman
on 2008-08-21 23:25:41
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Just a quick comment, then I'll let you get back to men bashing...
Finding the right partner is a matter of trial and error. As a woman, I know it's important for you to express the fact that you are a complex person with a wide and unique range of qualities, quirks, attributes and flaws. Quite contrary to popular belief (Sorry to shatter any myths) men also are complex creatures who have unique motives, desires, issues and needs.
I'm sure that you would not want to be contractually forced to stay in a relationship with someone you just started dating. Dating is a method in which people who are initially attracted to one another can peel back the layers of their prospective partner and conclude if they want to commit their lives to one another.
The unfortunate part is that while partner A may find partner B to be desireable under those layers, the same is not always true in the converse.
Women are not the only humans to invest trust, emotion, vulnerability, and time into a relationship only to find that their prospective partner has decided to move in another direction.
It is true, however cliche' it may sound, that it's not you, it's him. You are you, and will be exactly what someone is looking for under your layers. It's a matter of finding the person that is looking for the core you... and whether that person, under their layers is the person YOU want as well.
Good luck and try to enjoy the search!
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Posted by SmoothOperator
on 2008-08-26 13:00:23
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Well, I certainly wasn't intending to "Man Bash" So sorry if you got that impression. I am aware that men have the same emotions as women, and I of all people know that dating is an "application" process of sorts if you will. The issue I have is I have been dating for well over a decade and honey I have extremely bad luck in the dating game. I won't get into details I use my other blog for those memories of trauma hehe. Anyway, the focus I intended in this blog was simply to ask the question, "Is it worth the trouble?" I want to honestly know, because a lot of people that date long term, or get married eventually share, "this isn't what I thought it was going to be." I want the truth, because in this society we tend to make such a big deal out of relationships. I am questioning the value of the solid, stereotypical, upheld "idealistic relationship." I know they have their ups and downs. I have been in long term ones, but Marriage and all that jazz, with the divorce rates up and infidelity rampant is it really worth bothering to set a goal for such an "Experience" :O) Thanks for your comment.
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Posted by lovecrasher
on 2008-08-26 20:26:33
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