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lonelysoul's Blogs in October 2007

Just lost.
i really hate myself now. I've disappointed my family..........once again. You'd think I'd get used to it and become numb, but that's not the case. I don't know what to do. I want to scream, yell, cry. I want to kill myself or hurt another. I wouldn't do it, but the thought of it comforts me at......Read More

Posted on: 2007-10-07 03:32:58 | Rating:

| Views: 112 | Comments: 0 | Tags: boredom sad confused lost depressed

What am I to do?
I had the courage to get out of bed this morning, and I wish I didn't. From the moment I woke up, my parents called me and started stressing me out about different things. I wish I could change the way things are going. Do they not see that? If there was something I could do, I'd do it. It's......Read More

Posted on: 2007-10-07 15:01:09 | Rating:

| Views: 114 | Comments: 1 | Tags: confused boyfriend family life depression upset angry frustrated

Not going home
Thanks to someone who has read my blog, I am doing much better. I took the advice that was given and accepted things as they are. I definitely won't be dropping out of school and I will continue to walk with my head held up high. I should do something that makes me happy every now and then......Read More

Posted on: 2007-10-13 20:11:50 | Rating:

| Views: 120 | Comments: 0 | Tags: neutral family friends christmas new years

Time to pour my heart out
So, I'm not sure what to do. My friend picked me up from work tonight so I could spend the night at her house, we both thought I would start work later on tomorrow and not early morning. Now that I'm finishing up some work at her place, I realize that I actually have to go in tomorrow morning.......Read More

Posted on: 2007-10-22 20:50:17 | Rating:

| Views: 68 | Comments: 1 | Tags: friends heartbreak moving financial hardship

Friendly-Drunk?
I didn't really have the courage to tell my friend that I'm looking for apartments because I'd prefer to live alone for a few months. I did, however, have the courage to tell one of my really goods friends that I really cared for him, and that I understand that nothing may happen between us in......Read More

Posted on: 2007-10-25 22:38:36 | Rating:

| Views: 88 | Comments: 0 | Tags: Drunk love confusion memories friends crush lust like

Big Boys with too much attention
We went out last night, it was okay except for the fact that too many people were giving me attention and my friend suddenly feels, "safe, and proud to have such a friend" as that as the friend that I brought along. My one friend (Sarah) wanted to go out on a date with a guy (Matt)......Read More

Posted on: 2007-10-27 22:25:37 | Rating:

| Views: 101 | Comments: 0 | Tags: Friends Tall Big confused question club

What do I want?
When asked about what I wanted, I was not able to respond. If I had responded, I would have said that I wanted peace and harmony amongst people; to see people smile; to see my parents and family happy; to feed the poor; to build a mosque, a school and a hospital. But then I would have been......Read More

Posted on: 2007-10-30 12:28:15 | Rating:

| Views: 92 | Comments: 1 | Tags: confused sick questions life

Frustrated with "friends"
So last night, we were planning on going out. My friend went for a few minutes to see this guy, she locked me inside the house...I didn't have the remote to the gate and there was no way possible to jump the gate. She had told him to come over and bring a friend...her orders were,......Read More