Hiiiiiiiii!
I'm back!:) Haha, first off, Jamie Lynn Spears--preggo? I say, wowo!! What a shock. But, I wish her all the luck!!

Hmm, so my life today. Boring. Haha. I worked, hung out at the coffee shop I work at with my friends that are home, and then worked again! But, I did hear from Logan. Not a whole lot.. but he said he wants to drink tommorrow? So, maybe we'll figure something out!

Someone else talked to me today. Someone I dislike A LOT. His name? Bailey*. Why do I dislike him? It's another one of my amazing stories from the past that i'll explain at the end. He texted me, and asked me how I was? Why the hell was he talking to me now, when just a week ago, I was at the same basketball game as him, and he chose to ignore me. He hid behind his father with his equally disturbing new girlfriend, while his father asked me how my life was going.
"Well," I said loud enough for Bailey and Shawna* to hear me, "my boyfriend and two of his friends just died. But, i'm doing GREAT!"
I hope Bailey heard that. He should feel like shit.
I decided to not text Bailey back. He doesn't deserve my time. At all. I'm too good for that shit.

And, tonight's Gossip Girl is the SHIT! haha

But, okay, the past. First off, let's talk about who Bailey is. He was a boy that officially became my boyfriend on February 14, 2007. I know, how romantic, right? Dated four months, exactly. We met at school, and me going to a community college (just for two years, then it's off to a real universtiy, all expenses paid by scholarship..chyeah!) ment that NONE of my friends were home, so Bailey and I became attached at the hip. Not everyone accepted that fact since he had a history.  When he was younger, he stupidly drove his sister's friends around in a car when he was 15. He was drunk, went to fast over a railroad, and killed a person.  He was charged with that, and spent time in juvie, and lost his license until he was 18. Then, his jr. year in HS, he got caught selling drugs on school property, and then it was off to jail for 2 and 1/2 years. After he got out, he lost his license and was on probation until he was 23. But, he was making a new life for himself, so I thought. I thought he was going to do some good. And, Bailey was obbsessed with me, and I LOVED IT. I'd never had someone love me so much, and i was never more happy.  But, I didn't understand at the time, he was controling me....priming me for the future. Don't understand? Well, he NEVER had money, but I didn't care. I paid for everything. Bought him gifts. Drove him everywhere. I just thought that's what girlfriends did. But I was soo wrong. My friends never told me that I was CHANGING before their eyes. I was a lovesick puppy being controlled my her master. And what was he priming me for? Well, Bailey belonged to this church.. well more like cult... called.. mmm... The Direction*. I've always known the church was a cult. But, the people? Very nice. I've never had a problem. Sometimes, kind of pushy about beliefs, but hey, you'll have that. They believe there is no Heaven. They give all their money to the church(hints why I paid for everything). They believe you have no soul. When you're dead, you're dead till God comes to Earth. They believe in free sex between everyone, and even have parties to promote it. Cheating is not an issue. They are crazy. They even write there own Bibles. Speak in tounges to each other. I was fine with all this, because no one tried to force me to do anything. Until I found out Bailey was part of the direction.

It was a month or so into our relationship when i found out. I didn't care, because Bailey said he wasn't into it, just his parents. So, we left it at that. Two months later, he asked me to go to a service with him. Me, being open to LEARNING about new religions and being completely lovesick, joined him at his house. It was the craziest thing I have ever experienced. The touchyness. The speaking in Tounges. The teachings. Unbelievabley shocking. Bailey knew I didn't enjoy myself, and stopped pressing the issue. But, his parents didn't.
"What did you think?"
"Something you would like to do?"
I Just told them i was happy with were I was, and they shut up. For a while.

Weeks later, Bailey started asking me where we were going with our lives. We talked about marriage(insane). He asked me how we would raise our children with me being Catholic, and him not. I told him it would work out. And I really thought it would.

Finally, Bailey had to go to his little Direction church camp. It's a processes, comparable to Confirmation in the Catholic church, where all the people who had passed their "Adult Classes", spent two weeks in a hotel to become an adult in the church (And, which I didn't know, they are to come here and find a potential partner for the rest of there lives). They spend 10-12 hours a day doing nothing but living, breathing, and learning their bible by heart. They are not allowed to see anyone but their classmates. Bailey, being the rebel he was, always snuck out to see me at night. But, day by day, I could see him changing. On day three, my Grandmother died after suffering from Alzheimers for 10 years. It was hard.. but I had no idea what was comming when I went to see Bailey. As we sat in a deserted parking lot, he attempted to comfort me. I felt somewhat better, but you know how that goes. Then, he got a call from a girl (Shawna). Bailey NEVER let me talk to any men besides him and he followed the same rules, so I was shock to here this. He told her he would be right up, and that was that. I didn't think anything of it. Then, he brought up religion. He explained to me all about how he's learning so much here and loving it. I was happy to hear that he was finding something that made him so happy! Then he asked me about possibley converting. I simply said no, and left it that. He would not convert for me, and I found no need to do it for him. He told me he had to go, and just left.

I drove home confused. What the heck was happening? Day four. Ugh. I went there, like normal. But, he was competely different. He told me that we would not work if I didn't convert. His beliefs were right, and he couldn't understand why i couldn't choose his way. Shawna kept calling and calling. I finally just ended it. I cried and cried. and just left. He texted me saying, I love you hunnie, and i'm sorry you can't see things my way.
HIS WAY?! Gosh, i was heartbroken. My grandma dies, and then the next day, i loose my life. But, things didn't end there. The next day, Shawna was his girlfriend. He texted me everyday, saying he loved me. Yet, he sent me pictures of them kissing, and spending time together. He told me he called her my name, but she was all he could think about. On top of all this, I was going to my gmas funeral and crying uncontrolablly. What the heck was going on!? I slept with my parents in their bed for five days. I didn't go out. I just cried.
**Finally, his camp was over. Bye this time, I figured out that he cheated on me the very first day. Wow, he loved me, right? Shawna ADDED ME AS A FRIEND ON FACEBOOK, and uploaded tons of pictures of them kissing and UGH, she was wearing the necklace I GAVE HIM. I deleted all evidence that we were ever together, imedietly. We met to exchange are stuff back. What does he ask me to do? Take him to McDonalds. EFF NO. We got the shit done. He told me I was doing all the wrong things, and that God wouldn't accept me for who I was. Wow.

That's all you need to hear now. I promise, there are more of Bailey stories to come.
ahhhhhh but thanks all for listening!
And one thing....Can someone PLEASE help me pick out good men!? Lol, I don't think they exist!
♥ Me!:)