| View Blog
|
|
|
I know it's cliche and way over-stated - but why is it that we only want what we can't have? Perhaps it's the worst with adolecence, but it never fails. I came, what i thought, was a mega-realization the other day about my pattern with men. But when i went to explain it a co-worker they practically finished my sentence for me. He looks at me and says "Oh hunny, thats absolutely everybody!". Evidently, i'm not the only one who only wants what she can't have, when she can't have it.
I'm afraid of what may happen when you take away that element of forbidden desire. For me, it just falls flat. If there's no allure, no mystery, no passion or no competition, all bets are off. I'm not at all proud of that fact, just aware and i'm starting to know myself better than ever. Unfortunately, recently I mis-interpretted my faulty feelings of attraction for lust and found myself ditching a friend on his birthday to take home a 32 year old graphic designer. It was until the morning,after we shared a cab to my work and had a insesitive and borderline awkward goodbye that I had my realization. It wasn't him that I wanted, it wasn't his deep pockets, his skills on the pool table or even the way he liked to show me off. It was because I should'nt have been caught up in him that i was in fact.
See the difference between the older generations and mine is that we beleive in my a more honest form but being. Instead turning a blind eye to forbidden attractions for the mere fact that it's "wrong", we indulge from time to time to taste the fruit and perhaps play in the garden. In a new age world where monogamy is the real sin, we shouldn't shy away from oppertunities in disguise. We should rise to the occasion if we feel necessary and embrace raw and natural emotions in their purest state. But then again, isn't that how i ended up in the city in the first place? Because someone decided to follow through on their instincts. |
|
Posted by lenababy on 2008-01-12 19:22:12 | Rating: | Views: 36
|
| |
|
|
