| View Blog
|
| ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST!
|
|
|
|
this is my last blog here for a while. i cannot be here anymore. this has become to painful and poisonous to me. there are those that are very self righteous and "perfect" and personally i'm sick of them. i actually sent personal email to the people involved and grovelled for "forgiveness" and for what? making an error in judgement? an error in judgement that i was practically set up for? some men suck and there is no way around it. some need to lie and make others feel like they are the sole sinner when they are equally if not more so guilty. coming on to a woman that u know ur friend is interested in is not cool. maybe thats what they need for an erection. i don't know. its sad i got caught up in this shit and i am so sorry. they deserve each other so much because they feed off their own misery. me? i'm doing better and as soon as i leave here i'll be even better. i don't want to know whats being said or commentedon. my friends know where and how to contact me and thats what is important. i am free and am taking a small trip. believe it or not i came into a little wind fall and i can afford it. it's not a huge amount, i still have to work but i can afford a trip now and now is the time. i will miss my friends here and hope to come back at sometime when the shit is done and these people get a life of their own and decide that to make others miserable isn't so much fun. i need to get stronger and get well emotionally. right now i'm emotionally malnourished and starving. i need to find out who and what i am and that i don't need these men that want to control me. i will be able to come back and write what i want and comment when and what i want to. no more pulling blogs bc it doesn't please someone. i need to do this for me. it is going to be so hard not to post my daily happenings but i have some people on here that will keep me posted i'm sure. they know the numbers and addresses. i have deleted on my phone and computer and now its time to delete them from my life for good. i just cannot do it anymore. this last few days i've thought of suicide more than in the last 6 months. i almost did exactly that monday night. i had written in my post that i had dinner with a family and not alone. what i neglected to say was that i couldn't eat a thing. i went into my room and held a bottle of pills for so long my palms actually sweated off the label. i sat there for hours and hours just wanting to put them in my mouth. why? bc someone said i was "filthy whore". when those kinds of things came out of the spouses mouth i just let them roll off but when a "friend" says it i sit up and pay more attention. i start to think maybe i am. maybe i am the terrible person they say i am. so u see? i need to be away from here to get my perspective back. i need to be able to say "go fuck ur self" when someone says things like this again. i need to stop being such a weinie and get a back bone and be a woman that someone would be proud to have in their life. i need to do this very much. thank u to my real friends and if ur on my friends list then u know who u are. i love u so much. peace and harmony |
|
Posted by lastblastkl on 2008-03-26 18:08:58 | Rating: | Views: 211
|
| |
|
|
| Blog Comments
|
|
|
|
Oh my God...I'm so sorry for whats been said/done by some thoughtless arsehole! I second Bulleyes sentiment. You're a wonderful person and never let anyone tell you different. If you need time to yourself, to get strong and then come back and kick butt, or if you never come back to thoughts.com...or whatever...I wish for you only the very best life has to offer. You have decency and courage of the likes most can only dream of possessing, and I feel lucky to have met you and felt inspired by you.
Get away for a while, take a breath and have some 'you' time. God knows...you've earned it xxx
Lots of love and hugs xxxxx cheb xxxxx
|
|
Posted by chebtastic1
on 2008-03-26 18:41:14
|
|
|
|
|
WHY R U LEAVING? U R MY FIRST FRIEND HERE. I GOT UR EMAIL AND KNOW HOW TO CONTACT U AND I WILL. I HOPE U BECOME THE WOMAN I KNOW U CAN BE AND I KNOW U WILL. AND THE COMMENT ABOVE ME "COUNT ME IN TOO"
|
|
Posted by tinkerbell1988
on 2008-03-26 18:42:51
|
|
|
|
|
I believe what bulleye says...We will be there forever, that is what REAL FRIENDS DO.....I love you like a sister and Dont you let any man or woman run you off....You say what you need to say, and tell the little fuck heads that have something bad to say to show their face...........Chickens.....I will keep in touch with you my friend...Hang tough and Come back when you are ready......Love you.....Julian
|
|
Posted by Hollis
on 2008-03-26 19:33:01
|
|
|
|
K,
Sorry for the bad word but I am so hurt and mad that someone is running you off.....I felt so much from you and everyday I would come check in on you to keep you going and making sure you did what needed to be done.....I know you are one great person and you will be forever in my heart.....
|
|
Posted by Hollis
on 2008-03-26 19:35:36
|
|
|
|
|
okay, well instead of leaving, why not restrict your posts to your FRIENDS - cause we will be there for you ...as only friends can be!
|
|
Posted by EasyToSay
on 2008-03-26 19:43:26
|
|
|
|
|
Karen ... You are a remarkable woman with a beautiful spirit. Don't let someone's opinion become your reality. Like Hollis I come to your blog every day to check in with you. I also love you like a sister. I guess I have been lucky here as I haven't run into any nastiness. Although it was a concern to me when I signed up. The thing about "thoughts" is YOU have total control over who sees your posts. That in itself was a comfort to me and one of the reason I picked this site to blog. When you write your post under "Title" there is "Who Can View" ... click on the little blue arrow and click "friends and me". If someone is on your friend's list that you don't want to read your posts delete them. Take care and enjoy your trip. Whether you are here or not you will remain in my thoughts and prayers. Peace.
|
|
Posted by ColoradoDreamin
on 2008-03-26 20:29:03
|
|
|
|
|
I am right behind you, Bullseye. Gun ready and cocked. Don't let this underling tell you keep you away too long for us. Always remember that we love you and we are here for you. Im about to cry this is too much. Love ya
|
|
Posted by Nubian
on 2008-03-27 02:06:38
|
|
|
|
|
wow, u stired my emotions, when speaking of holding onto that botle of pills, not sure in what 2 do. i am glad that u didn't then and i hope that u never do. i don't know of your situation and i am sure u have great friends here, and if desire another from australia, i am open 2 your lovely heart. with kindest regards steve
|
|
Posted by yeovile
on 2008-03-27 06:15:54
|
|
|
|
You are flowing down a river of emotions, so the real jerks on here and in life hurt more.
Don't let the bastards get you down!!!
You did whatever you did or did not do to be happy, now stay happy and stay here
|
|
Posted by whiteknight
on 2008-03-27 07:03:26
|
|
|
|
|
Karen, Do what you need to do for you. Put yourself first always. A minor/major flirtation online is nothing to be called names over. In the place you are in right now, you were vulnerable. Vulnerable people do things out of the norm, even for them. You teach people how to treat you and I think it is time you stood up to MEN in general and demand the respect you want and deserve. Don't worry about their name calling. Remember poison in a pitcher ..poisons the pitcher.. long before it reaches the cup. People who would call you these names are not worth your time. Sometimes people say things to hurt you because they have no other way of transferring their pain/anger, especially online. If you want to leave, then go with blessing. If you want to stay, then do it. There is strength in numbers and it looks to me the numbers are on your side. Good luck and enjoy your little trip. Let go of the angst. Focus on the positive. If it helps, write down 5 things you are thankful for every day. You are blessed with a new beginning..make it all about you this time around. shemelts :)
|
|
Posted by shemelts
on 2008-03-27 08:48:05
|
|
|
|
|
Don't let anyone run you off of a site that you know and love. There should be a way to block them from contacting you. We are all inspired from you and don't want to lose you! Have a wonderful time on your trip, you deserve every minute of it. --Megan
|
|
Posted by TheAlreadyJaded
on 2008-03-27 11:30:15
|
|
|
|
|
The ignorance and insensitivy of some folks just staggers me. Some men (I think we're talking about a man, right?) prey on women in the most vulnerable positions and they are pure cowards, chicken shits and you don't deserve that kind of treatment. I agree with everyone's comments here and I am with you, my sister Karen. Don't let anyone bring you down. Take that trip, heal yourself and your heart, and come back to us. As always, I will be checking in on you. Courage and strength is what I pray for you. Lots of love, Ellie
|
|
Posted by Ellie2008
on 2008-03-27 16:20:48
|
|
|
|
|
You have to do what is ok within you. I hope that you find it back here, you have a strong support network here and it may be hard to let that go. I hope that one person does not run you off, for some people this is their haven. I wish you the best.
|
|
Posted by prelude2it
on 2008-03-27 17:34:49
|
|
|
|
I agree, stay away from the blogs for a while. Later you can always come back again if you want to, after everything is calm down.
I'm wishing you all the very best....
|
|
Posted by Gwatlan
on 2008-03-27 22:15:43
|
|
|
|
I just started reading your blogs. I am horrified to know some people have been mean to you. But I haad that to from one particular man. I didn't even read his last email, just deleted it.
God bless. Best wishes to you. I hope you have a safe and happy trip. Hope you come back soon. Take care!
|
|
Posted by Fancie
on 2008-03-28 16:03:19
|
|
|
|
|
|
