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| 1-900-CALL SATAN....AND I DID!
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Last nite I was up with a friend trying to help her sort out her current shitty life. I think...no...I know she is going to be ok. The other person involved? I don't think he'll ever be ok but I told her thats not her problem. She just needs to get herself back on track and leave the others involved to wallow in their own miseries bc they deserve what they get. Sounds very angry but its the truth...You reap what you sow! She'll be just fine....So I was tired this morning!
But me? After today I'm not sure I will ever be ok again. This morning started out perfect.....couldn't have been more perfect. The first voice I heard was of someone that has become so dear to me I cannot even put it into words. The first voice!!!!!!! I was shocked and so pleasantly surprised I could and almost did cry.....ok...I did cry a little. I got up after speaking to them and proceeded to get the boys. I had to go to my work for two meetings. One for the golf tournament and one for another issue. I thought we would stop for a nice leisurely lunch and then go into the meetings. I promised the boys I would take them shopping afterwards and get them each a surprise if they were really good. I knew they would be but I wanted to give them an added incentive....never hurts.
I had to go to the bank first.....bad move! I just needed to get some money out of the bank. I got behind two cars.....the first one had a medium transaction to do. I waited patiently.....The second lady must have wanted to take out a fucking loan bc she was there almost 25 min. I'm thinking 'lady....get out of your freaking car and go into the bank'. I had to turn my jeep off bc it was overheating in the 104 heat. The mighty Flintmobile doesn't do well sitting there idling for that long. Finally she moved on....Ahhhhhh its about damn time. I took care of my transaction in about 1 min. and I even got two lollipops....geeeesh!
Decided to take a different way out of Etown. BAD IDEA! We passed a couple of cops sitting outside town on a speed thingy. I wasn't speeding so I just went on my merry way.....I looked in my mirror and saw these flashing lights.....WTF and thought I wasn't doing anything wrong so I didn't stop. WRONG! Suddenly he turned on his sirens....I felt like Bonnie of Bonnie and Clyde. I pulled over to the side and this cop saunters over to me. 'miss, do you know why I stopped you?'...WTF? If I knew that answer then i wouldn't have done it to begin with! "No sir I don't".....'You're not wearing your seatbelt'......OH SHIT! was the only thing I could think of. I had forgot to put it back on after the bank bitches. 'Gonna have to write you up for that'....yada yada yada......He goes back to his car....My ac is broke and the boys and I are sitting there cooking in this heat. I think I was just about 'well done' when he comes back up to my car.....'Um...miss....you need to sign this yada yada.....and while I was looking up your information I noticed you are driving on suspended tags'......Now I'm really thinking WTF?. 'Huh?'....is all I could mutter. Seems I never went to the MD Emissions testing place and had my car tested. And now I had a fine and he was about to ticket me for it. Riley meanwhile kept asking him.....'Are you going to take my grandma to jail?' I think the cop thought it was cute but Riley was worried I would go to jail and he and Jared would sit there all day alone. The officer assured him I was indeed not going to the slammer and then told me he wasn't going to issue me a ticket for my tags since I would have a hefty fine from the emissions place anyway. I thanked him and off we went.
My next stop was lunch. We went to the next town over instead of going to the one in my town.....why? you may ask.....bc I was short on time and thought it would be quicker to go to the next town.....WRONG AGAIN! We went into Mickey D's and gave our order.....I stood there for about 10 min as the guy was periodically putting our food on our tray.....thinking to myself ....'self....isn't our stuff going to get cold?'....while self said...'hell yes'...but I left it. My burger came up and the woman behind the counter grabbed it and gave it to some old geezer who came in AFTER ME! I wanted to smack her right in her old cheezy face! My guy went over to get my burger and it was gone.....Finally after another few minutes another burger came up and that sucker was mine. We had been in there about 25 min. just waiting for our food....Good call Karen....didn't want to go to Etown bc you didn't want to waste time and Ttown was worse. Kharma baby.....Etown sent you bad kharma. By this time it was too late to eat there so I told the boys....gotta eat in the jeep. Which they thought was cool bc it was like a picnic to them. Got everyone settled in and left.
Went up about a block and noticed another cop sitting along side of the road.....Speeding...nope....check......Seat belt.....clicked and on....check.....Boys.....safe and sound.....check.....So I just cruised right on by him......Next thing I see is flashing lights in my rearview mirror.....Did I stop? NO! Kept driving bc I knew I wasn't and hadn't done anything wrong.......Heard the noise.....sirens......Jesus Christ.....what the hell is wrong now? I pulled over on the side of the road AGAIN. And this cop really saunters along side my jeep......'Know what I stopped you for?'....What the hell kind of question is that anyway? That has got to be one of the dumbest things ever asked! But again I said and with much more honesty than the last time.....'No I don't officer'......'Well you're driving on suspended tags'.......What did that other cop do? Tattle on me and hi tail it to Ttown from Etown? I'm thinking 'Can't anyone keep a freaking secret anymore?'. God! I explained about the other policeman and what he had said and that he didn't give me ticket bc I would have a fine ready for me when I got there. Riley keeps telling this cop....'You don't look like the cop that stopped my mommaw before'. I'm thinking 'quiet riley' and trying to send him the 'nix it' with my brain waves. 'Are you going to take me mommaw to jail?' The policeman smiled at Riley.....He went back to his car and then comes back 15 min. later and informs me he is going to be 'nice' to me and do the same. I flashed my baby blues at him and said 'ty'. Now Riley tells him....'If you take my mommaw to jail can Jared and I ride in your car?'....no shit...this kid is turning me in for a ride in a cops car? Oh the pain of it......he sold me cheap....real cheap!
On to my workplace we went.... my meeting? Almost 90 min late.! I sat and talked to the residents and my coworkers and the boys got plenty of stuff from the snack machines and the kitchen. My boss? has no idea what the hell is going on with the tournament.....and the other meeting was so boring I could have slept. Left there and headed to Md Emissions.
I ran inside and told them my story and I explained I never got a paper. They subtracted the fine......HURRAY! and just charged me the $14 for the test. I pulled up my car and got out. Some dude got in and the first thing he says.....'Got AC?'.....'NO I don't'....'Oh dude'.....'Oh, go screw yourself' (under my breath). He pulls my car up on the thing and begins to rev the motor.....now my car needs work, I'll be the first to admit that. And it tends to overheat when pushed......I knew this too.The Mighty Flintmobile isn't what it used to be. What I didn't know was some jerk with a major hard on for gas pedals was driving it now. He never once took his foot off my gas pedal. He had it floored the entire time he had it. I knew he was going to blow something....I knew it. After this continued I finally yelled out to 'stop' and he did and then turned the motor off. My car was majorly overheated. He then tried to start it again and nothing. It turned over and that was it. He kept at it and at it and finally again I yelled to stop using the gas pedal to start it. It doesn't need the gas pedal to start the engine. So he did. But now it was flooded and overheated and it was gone. They had to push it out of the way to make way for the other cars. I went out after letting it cool for a few and it started up but you could tell it was sickly. I got some water and filled that up and then it died. My car was dead. Funeral services will be held.............
It was 106 in the shade and I'm sitting there with a dead car, two little boys,and 45 min. from home. I called everyone I could think of....no one answered. I had nothing left to do but dial.....1 900 CALL SATAN. So I did. He was more than happy (after giving me shit) to come to my aid. He wanted to say 'I told you so' so freaking bad its a wonder he could breathe. And he did A LOT. It seems the guy blew up my fuel pump. And now i have no car.....and Satan is charging me to come and get me.....as he explained...gas prices and all. I will have to get a tow truck to come and tow me back home so I can get it fixed. How much will all this cost me? No idea! But as Satan drove the boys and I home I was sure I saw his horns and his tail. I thanked him for his help and assured him I would indeed pay him back if I had to take out a personal loan. I don't want to owe this jerk a friggin thing.
So that was my wonderful day.....and how was yours?
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Posted by lastblastkl on 2008-06-10 19:21:23 | Rating: | Views: 89
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Oh, wow - that sucked! And I can't believe some bitch went through the bank drive-through for a 25 minute transaction! Some people are so freakin inconsiderate!
The good news is that it likely can't get any worse :)
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Posted by Meredith
on 2008-06-10 21:02:46
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Bank drive-through??? God I wish we had that in the land of Oz!!
Tomorrow can only be better.....you made me laugh, thanks :)
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Posted by Kaybee
on 2008-06-11 05:06:59
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Remings me of that song, "..the stars are stacked against you girl, better get back in bed.." Super K, tomorrow will be better. Just look back at it all and laugh now that it's over. :)
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Posted by spiritualcoma
on 2008-06-11 12:50:46
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That is definitely a terrible horrible no good very bad day!
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Posted by TheAlreadyJaded
on 2008-06-11 15:46:39
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