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What would things be like here if I had the freedom to say absolutely anything I wanted? I'm sure I'd get fired. Because here is exactly what I would say to the people in this place if I ever had the nerve and/or opportunity.
To Huttenbomb (AKA H-Bomb): I am not deaf are you? Get off your ass and come talk to me when you have something to say. Also please only say something once. I do not need it repeated 10x for me, I understood it the first time through. And one more thing, go potty before you leave your house, I don't like to have to work with your after stank wafting around the building.
To Stickboss: Please eat. You make me nervous. I'm afraid if I breath in your general direction I will break you.
To Highwaters: Retire. You are going cranky faster than milk goes sour.
To RVK: Get a new set of wheels. That little safari thing you're driving right now is so ugly I am holding back the urge to take a Louisville Slugger to it.
To Brenda: Ask for a big fat raise and a better office. Then pick yourself up off the floor and stop being everyone's rug.
To Jen: Before you left I didn't like you. I thought you were stuck up. But, when you visited I realized I actually do like you. You are a pretty cool one.
To Azon: End the dillusion that if you comb your hair just right no one will see how thin it is. We all see your scalp sweetie, from across the room. I suggest you see a stylist ASAP as they make shampoo for that. And then get your big ass some trainers if you intend to keep stomping around the building. Oh, and one last thing...give Brittany her headset back.
To the Pod: You give me the creeps. The only time I see you is when you are entering/exiting the bathroom. There is just something seriously wrong with that.
To Rose: I know you tore it up in your day. I'll hand it to you, you intimidating the hell out of me at first, but not anymore.
To Chatty: No one cares what your mother ate for breakfast. In fact no one cares about anything that comes out of your mouth. So, shut the hell up.
To Karen: You have the patience of a saint. If I were in your position I'd be in prison right now for murdering Chatty & H-Bomb.
To Robyn: Go ahead and say what you really think. The world won't end, I promise.
To Jim: Admit it, you have absolutely no clue what is going on do you? You should have been a used car salesman.
To Weymo: You need counseling. Really. You are mean, and what's really bad about it is you don't even realize when you're doing it.
To Rhino: Go to marriage counseling ASAP or get a divorce ASAP. Choice is yours. Either way, quit your damn whinning and leave Mandie alone: she is NOT interested.
To Miss Congeniality: Please get a personality, chisel off the ice that surrounds your so-called heart and go buy yourself a skirt that actually fits.
To Mandie: Because I can't think of I better way to put it-I love you like a fat kid loves cake. Please come with me. Please...
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Posted by ladiegodiva on 2007-11-29 13:02:00 | Rating: | Views: 93
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Great blog!
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Posted by Whitters
on 2007-11-29 13:24:15
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Thank you Darlin'.
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Posted by ladiegodiva
on 2007-11-29 13:25:45
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Ha! I frickin' died when I read the one for Jim cuz it is SO true. He would have been AWESOME used car salesman.
& I love ya too but I think I love ya like meth addict loves meth. ;)
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Posted by Mandie142
on 2007-11-29 14:35:29
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LOL! too funny!
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Posted by Arik
on 2007-11-29 18:23:28
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Awww....don't you love offices? I remember mine not so fondly...I had nicnames for peeps too, and Mandy...Go With Her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Posted by Rajah1116
on 2007-11-30 08:28:34
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