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Therapy on Paper
March 4th I feel a loss. Even though everything is ok. Even though I'm smiling. Even though I'm in control There is always something missing. Take my pain. My struggle. the thousand things that live with me and have no name. My pain is absolute. Undefined.......Read More
Posted on: 2008-03-15 18:23:39 |  Rating: | Views: 62 | Comments: 0 | Tags: sickness  pain  poetry 
the new guy I'm seeing
and so it ocurred to me today that I don't really know Matt that well. I mean, I'd overlooked that fact until now becaue I'd gotten so carried away with my feelings. Oh, lust. I just want this new thrilling relationship to be all that I've been missing and spending so much time on new clothes and......Read More
Posted on: 2008-03-08 06:46:15 |  Rating: | Views: 64 | Comments: 0 | Tags: dating 
Friday, feb 22, 1:15 pm (at work)
The headband I'm wearing that makes me look sixteen with the pants and shoes that aren't my own with the impossibly mature red orange turtleneck. and I'm sitting in a cubicle. with an empty cup of coffee. staring at AAA logos and enjoying the solitude while everyone is out for......Read More
Posted on: 2008-03-07 23:15:08 |  Rating: | Views: 57 | Comments: 0 | Tags: work  office  cubicle  pondering 
A million questions for god Explicit Content
So, I've been talking to God lately. Which is a loaded statement for me. I've been thinking about how improbable it all is. Life. Destiny. Meaning. Ellie took off today from her leash when my mom let her o...Read More
Posted on: 2008-02-16 00:00:59 |  Rating: | Views: 57 | Comments: 0 | Tags: spirituality  anger 
I'm SO done with all of this crap!!!
I know. Depressing title. But, here is the good news: It ends happily. Yes, I am happy. And it seems somehow really too ridiculous when I mention all that has happened.  That I could be happy after all of this incredibly abrupt change, or that so many things really have changed. I can't......Read More
Posted on: 2008-02-09 03:20:23 |  Rating: | Views: 67 | Comments: 0 | Tags: new year  friends  changes  dog 
Oh, what a month
So I decided that I couldn't handle things the way they had been going. I spent many nights last semester reading and re-reading the posts on apalastic anemia websites, pleading for someone to understand all that I've been going through. There had to be somebody my age who is going through this......Read More
Posted on: 2008-01-14 21:04:39 |  Rating: | Views: 55 | Comments: 0 | Tags: fear  dog  breakup 
Sad and Lonely
Since school started, things with me have been extra rough, and I know it affects Stephen. Unforunately for the both of us, hes more the strong silent type, so I can only guess at what he's going through. The past few weeks, for many reasons, have really been overwhelming, and he's the only......Read More
Posted on: 2007-11-17 15:48:13 |  Rating: | Views: 100 | Comments: 1 | Tags: lonely  angry  tired  sad  boyfriend issues 
The Diagnosis-the backstory of this blog-PART I
November 2006 I had my keys in my apartment door, my arms full of bags, cold and shivering from the november air, gasping for breath after the flight of stairs. For several weeks there had been unexplained breathlessness, fatigue, headaches, and dizziness. But, like anyone who......Read More
Posted on: 2007-11-15 21:16:48 |  Rating: | Views: 60 | Comments: 0 | Tags: chronic illness  hospital  doctor  diagnosis 
Greetings and Salutations!
I must apologize, first and foremost, for my attitude. In fact, you can and should expect a lot of it. This is not teenage angst or anything like it, because for one, I am not a teenager. But there will be complaints here. There is an upside- I have a fantastic sense of humor, if I do say so......Read More
Posted on: 2007-11-15 21:00:40 |  Rating: | Views: 63 | Comments: 0 | Tags: chronic illness  21  college  blood disorder  bitter 

                 
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