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It has been 1 year since I started loving the same guy. It's been 6 months since we've been apart, and we had only been officially together for 2 months. All this being said, why do I still love him more than ever?
Let's rewind: I met pretty boy in August during my cousin's 18th birthday. I saw him more than once a week for the whole month of August for cottilon practices. I only saw him nothing more than a friend, who I must addmit had a good physical appearence, but I never thought of having feelings for anyone that time, not while in the Philippines and I would leave the next month.
August 24, the birthday. He sang in front, "It might be you"
How beautiful was his voice.
The night was coming to an end, although he swore to himself it would not end until he shared a dance with me. We danced to Joe - No one else comes close.
That was it, I know there is no denying, there is definely some feelings involved in this "friendship"
September 6, during my last week before departure back to Canada
He gave me a bouqet of a douzen sweet roses.
Attached with a long letter, as he requested that I read it when I was alone.
As we sat by a steaming hot window, it did not matter because we were in the moment.
He had told me how afraid he was of the feelings he had, although he did not want me to leave unless I knew how he had really felt, that this is the first time he loved again since his first love.
I said the same.
The night before departure, he calls me to say the final goodbye, and that I was his angel. ='(
November 9
I come back to the Philippines.
He says: I am so happy that you are back, but at the same time, I am sad because I know you will leave again. We agree in remaining but friends to spare the hurt of seperating once again.
He becomes my dance partner for my 18th birthday cotillon.
Practice after practice, hand in hand untill we simply never let go, even when practice would be over.
The birthday is over.
My mother grants me a wish, and she lets me stay in the Philippines to go to school. Of course, I enroll in the same school he's in, San Beda College Alabang. He takes good care of me there, kisses me goodmorning, brings me to my classes, we have lunch together with his friends, and kisses me goodbye. We text whenever we were apart.
No official date
We have our first quarrel. My mother ask me where I stand in his life. He holds my hand, but we aren't really together? I confront him, and he says it's complicated. I suggest we quit the games we are playing, I assume he does not feel he could commit to me, what is the point in "love."
Puerto Galera December 21
We are all at the beach with my friends having a few drinks and having fun being young.
He looks at me, so lovable, although somewhat had almost enough to drink.
He told me we needed to talk, but we both weren't our 100% sober selves, I refuse to speak about anything serious.
Night of December 22
We walk along the shores of the white sand beach. He goes on one knee, ask me to officially be his girlfriend, and that he had just waited for the right moment, and romantic setting.
Ride back to Manila
It is the most pleasent bus ride back, snuggled warm close to him despite the cold strong air conditionning.
-Happy days-
All night outing to Jaipur and then Baywalk.
He never let me go, even when we were in the van, and we were all tired and sleeping, I moved alot and we were very uncomfortable not having the space to stretch, although as fussy as I was, he always had be hugged in his arms. We shared our first kiss early morning.
Bad News
My parents change there mind about me staying in the Philippines, as it would hurt my educational background and limit my futur opportunities in Canada.
I tell prettyboy, he understands and is supportive, but nothing is the same after.
We grow apart, he is distant. I assume he is this way because he is preparing himself for the hurt of our once again, seperation.
Despite the love we share, we break up.
He addmits he is not strong enough for long distance relationship.
I am angry, to bitter, to sad, to depressed.
Why didn't he love me enough to be stong and hold on?
I kept hope, until September 24
He is courting another girl.
It's the end. Story of a heartbroken girl.
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Posted by ki_1six on 2007-09-29 00:19:56 | Rating: | Views: 111
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