Finally... I win!
I get a call early this morning from the school board of my son's school. They want to meet with me, my husband and my son. Well of course, my husband is working, so he can't make it, and God forbid he makes ANY change in his schedule. Well after me begging him to accompany us, he agrees on the condition it is only for one hour, and no longer. (ooohhhh) So we get there and there sits the principle the Librarian and a few members of the school board. We sit down, and they go over the problem we encountered with my son bringing the Bible into the Library and reading it. (Those of you that are not familiar with what I am talking about can read my post "I have had all I can stand of this")
Anyway...I could hardly sit still, listening to them, but they had said they did take my complaints (I had made several, and threatened not to stop at the school board) into consideration and considered everything I had mentioned about the 1st Admendment, and as long as my son wasn't bothering anyone else, or trying to encourage others to read it, it would be fine for him to bring his choice of reading materials to school, as long as it wasn't to do others harm. We just stood up and said Thank You, shook their hands and left.
My son was sooooo embarrassed. He said..."I'm never going to be able to show my face in school again, I'm going to be known as the Bible toting kid...I just wanted to read that one part." I just laughed and told him he was funny, and no one will even know what happened. Then I said..."What about ME, I will be know as the Mom Bitch." My husband chimes in (the first time he opens his mouth through this whole thing)..."Well at least you're a cute sexy Mom bitch" (right in front of my son)
Now...why does he have to say that. Here I was feeling so good about the accomplishment I had made, I could of blown it off, but I fought and fought for the rights of these kids, I finally win this battle and he makes some sexist remark. Instantly I was pissed. How demeaning. He didn't even see what it took in me to fight all these people over this one principle. All he thought about what how I looked doing it! :(
Well he's driving fast to get back to work, going over the speed limit (as usual), and gets pulled over.(HA-HA)!
I so wanted to scream...I told you to slow down you fast driving freakoid! (cuz I was pissed at him now). As the police is walking over, my husband is saying..."Don't they have anything better to do, he was just hiding back there." Well DUH!!!
The police officer comes over and says..."Do you know how fast you were going?" He plays Stupid and arrogant, like he doesn't realize he was speeding. So I lean in over and said. "I'm sorry officer, we just had a meeting with the school board, and I made him come with, he's late to get back to work, so it's my fault if he was speeding." The police officer, said..."Just watch it around here...and slow it down, next time I won't be so nice!" Then he let us go. No ticket. Thank Goodness.
I said..."Next time, I won't be so nice either!" He said..."I can't believe how easy you women have it." I told him, all you have to do is tell the damn truth and be nice and quit acting like a big ass. You don't own the damn road. It's his job to hide and watch for speeders like you. That's what he's paid to do. Follow the law and you won't get caught breaking it!
So...my Ha-Rah this morning, turned into "don't come to close or I'll slap the shit out of you!
But I do feel good to know I made it better for the young kids. I'll be their crusader anyday!!!
Posted by keepdreaming on 2008-03-24 15:29:12 | Rating: | Views: 170
luckyluci,
now I would NEVER be upset at you for any comment, it's only your opinion... and I know you are not familiar with the way this entire thing has played out. It has been one not so pretty battle. I have been up to the school a number of times with complaints, due to the fact that the principle was avoiding me. She was aware of the situation through the Librarian. So I went to the Superintendant. That raised holy hell with the principle, so she then made a POINT to see me. It was ugly. Nothing was resolved so I addressed the school board at the school board meeting, which was very intimidating and ugly as well. Nipping in the bud that if my son recieved any fall out from this, the school system would have the biggest law suit they had ever seen. ALL this time MY husband refused to get involved. He wanted nothing to do with it. Thinking I was dealing with fire. I wouldn't back down. I lost more sleep over this. I so wanted him to talk to about this, to bounce things off him, but he didn't even want to talk to me about it. He just would say..."Hey you're on your own with this one!" So when they finally called and said they wanted to meet with all of us, I begged him to come, just to present a unified front, even though he was not helping me out. so when he made that comment about "cute sexy mom bitch" It totally made me sick that NOW that I won this fight, he was ready to joke around about it. Give me a break!
That was my problem with it.
Anyway...Thanks for the encouragement on the battle with the school!!!!
I appreciate the support!!!
God Bless!!!
I agree EasyToSay, I was not giving up on that! I lost more sleep over that because I just could not let it go!!
I had to fight for that right for these kids and what our schools in this country were trying to take away from them. I just wouldn't give up! My husband just sat by like none of this even bothered him, but boy the first time he gets caught speeding,(which is his own fault for breaking the law)he goes into "Mr Arrogant, how dare anyone stop ME"...routine. Where was that side of him when I was fighting the school? He had no interest in standing up with me then. He sat in that big office this morning saying NOTHING the entire time, like this was all his wifes doing, and he had no part in it.
So Thank You for your comment, and for seeing my side, it made me feel better. God Bless!!!
Bravo!!!!!!!! Glad this got resolved admirably for you.
I totally get and understand why your husband's remark upset you. Men just seem to have a way of saying the most inappropriate things at the wrong time. Sometimes these kind of remarks come when a man feels uncomfortable ... and believe it or not my men friends tell me it's a sexual turn on when their women is assertive, stands up for what she believes and comes away a winner. I know .... I know ... not what you wanted to hear.
I couldn't tell from your post if your husband was as upset and appalled by these events as you were. Maybe he felt inadequate and bad that he couldn't voice his concerns in public. In your husband's childhood, I'm wondering, how he was taught to deal with conflict.
As I read your original post my thought was that in many places in the world your son, caught reading his bible, would have been thrown in a dark dungeon or put before a firing squad. Your whole family would most likely have suffered a similar fate as well. Things are far from perfect here, but I feel blessed each day to live in a country with so many religious freedoms. Now you are probably saying to yourself ... that's not the correct way to think ... where does that kind of thought come from.
In my childhood there was always a worse situation brought up ... "eat your vegetables ... someone else doesn't have food to eat" .... when I didn't have the popular hip shoes and everyone made fun of me .... "be glad you have feet ... some people don't have feet". I was also taught not to make waves or trouble as it would only make things a 1,000 times worse. To this day I struggle with something that isn't working because a change might make it even worse ... at least it's working a little bit I tell myself.
Perhaps your husband wanted to vent his anger at this situation, but was to fearful to do so. So that frustration came at the police officer instead. Kind of like when someone comes home from work after being yelled at by their boss and kicks the dog.
Relationships and men continue to be a mystery for me. I know a lot of very passive men and they are not going to change for me or anyone else. There are many days when I just say .... bring on the convent .... maybe we can be roommates. Congrats on your win. Peace.
Isn't it amazing how a woman can turn into a tigress when her cub is threatened? Well done you for standing up for your son and for his rights. Political Correctness just gets worse and worse. As to your husband, well.... I think it would be nice if he had said that to you when you were alone as that would have been a compliment. It was, I agree, inappropriate for him to have said it when he did. You deserved a whole lot more respect than that. It does sound like he has to re evaluate his life and take time to smell the roses. But then again......you are the lady to show him that. Be patient my friend and all will come right in the end. Meanwhile just enjoy winning the battle.
Dang, I could smell the Estrogen from across the web:P PEEYOO!
Cripes, ladies! Cut the guys some slack! I cant believe this...well, I can but dont want to be sexist!:P
Really disappointing. I dont know what Dad does for work...but cripes. He WORKS! And, cant cut out like that!
And, then he didnt say anything at this meeting--cuz there were mostly women there, right? DUH! He was playing safe and smart! Unless he wanted to be there longer than the hour he allowed himself(or was permitted to leave work), he would be a fool to speak up and get ladies going. That is an easy one. And, THEN he throws a sly compliment your way(which I was only shocked he would say in front of the son--but I come from a very sheltered family:P), and you take it as a sexist remark. If I was him, Id never bother to help with anything again. Cool down, KD. Seriously. This is your friend giving you some tough love here. You are way too hard on him for such a lil thing. And, that cop scene...couldn't you have shown a lil support/respect? Yes, he sped and was caught. Yes, you got him out of it with your pretty face(to a cop who may have been lonely himself). But, to stick it to him like that? Unnecessary. Cripes, if I was him and had to go back to work? Id be an angry mess. Total emotional frustration...a relationship red flag. Big time. I am getting all worked up now!!:P
As for the Bible battle...that WAS rather ridiculous. Must be some really freakish atheist school. Granted, any religious materials that go against or make people question the residing philosophy WILL cause trouble. It is no different than a pagan book in a catholic school. Why such a book would even be allowed is a mystery. But, if he was not bothering anyone or pushing his ideas on someone...who cares?? He was doing himself a private service/study.
Guess I should be glad it is settled? But, I am not sure it was a victory. Sorry if you don't like what I have said here...but I had to be honest. You got me worked up defending men:P UGH!!!
Colorado, alot could hold true on your view about my husband not wanting to make things worse, that's why he didn't want to take a stand with me. But he is a very vocal person, with very strong opinions, which is why when I needed him to help me help our son, and the rest of these kids, and he just turned away, I felt like we just weren't a priority. His work came first. He has a self centered personality, and if it doesn't involve him personally, he could care less about it. I'm just happy it's over and we can move on. Thank you for your caring comment. I always so appreciate hearing from you!
With love!
Hi foxx_flie,
OMG...I love you too!!! hee-hee-hee!!!
Oh...he was acting like a big ass!! Oh yeah, he was trying to be funny...ha-ha...really funny...I was really laughing hard...ohh...he cracked the big funny...ha-ha. NOT!! Normally if he would of said that, had he helped me I would of thought it was sweet, but not after he made it painfully clear "I was on my own with THAT fight." He should of kept his wise cracks to himself at that point. Anyway...Thank you for your sweet comment. See you at your stop!
God Bless!
Thank You FarAway, I am enjoying knowing that the kids won the battle, I was just their fighting for them. What would these schools turn out like in 20 years if we slowly let the school systems start taking their God given rights away. The land of the FREE...that is where we live! Not some communist country. The land of the FREE! Schools teach in 5th grade about the Constitution and all the Amendment. Well lets start practicing what we teach!
Thank you for sharing your comments. I love to hear from you!
God Bless!
Well Hi Brainstormer. Ohhh it's not going to work...you aren't going to make me mad at YOU!!!! NO way!!! But I will address your comments... No I didn't say there were more women at this meeting. Actually there were MORE MEN. 2 women besides myself, and 3 men besides my husband. So he could have easiler spoke up, but he didn't want to take part in this whole thing because it has nothing to do with HIM PERSONALLY, therefore it is a waste of HIS time. I know that may sound harsh, but that is basically how he is. He normally is a very outspoken man, with high principles and when he feels HE'S been wronged...watch out, he speaks out LOUD AND CLEAR.
Leaving his work is not a problem, he sets his own schedule. He is an investor, and is very flexible with his time, as long as it is something he WANTS to involve himself in. THIS HE DID NOT. So he was being a big ass! When it was all over, and we left that office, he was feeling happy again because he knew he wouldn't be asked to help me out with this anymore, although he wouldn't lift one finger to help until that morning when I begged him to at least come to that meeting. So when he made that remark thinking he was Mr. Funny man, I didn't find it one bit funny, I was quite offended and pissed that he could just blow off all my work in one brief second like it was a big joke. Then when he was speeding...He was driving like way too fast. I warned him twice to slow down, but noooo, he kept it up...so he deserved it. I could of sat back and let him dig himself into a hole with the police officer, but I helped him. I thought I was being nice.
Sorry if I got you worked up over this, you don't need to defend HIM...he can stand on his own two feet. Trust me!
Thank You though for caring enough to give me tough love. ;) I'd never get mad at you for that, nor will I ever stop being your friend...SO THERE---> :P (that's your sign) :)
:) I dont know if I should blush, wet myself or what:P
Gosh...:]
Well, thank YOU for explaining his situation better. Now, it DOES seem like he is a bit selfish/self-centered...perhaps my dark side? The me I could be but dont want to be?
I am seriously a lil scared, cuz I can picture myself doing those things...minus the fast driving maybe, but who knows. My dad tends to be James Bond on the road when time is short. Mom will get mad at him alot...but he seems to like the thrill of the chase as if he has earned it in his old age:P
So, now the compliment/smartmouth remark DOES seem to have lost some of its appeal...but, still, that is mainly cuz you were focussed on how unhelpful and self-centered he was. I still found it kinda cute:P--minus the bitch part(but then, that would have just been openly reflexive anyway...just repeating words but adding the lil extra).
I personally would have let him deal with the cop himself after all that. If I was as mad as you...yeah. Let him deal with it. Dont put the female persuasion issue into the mix. There will always be other times for that.
Now, I wonder what keeps you two together at all;/...and dont you dare tell me what I would expect most women on here to tell me next:P If you do, Ill go silent for a while.
Congratulations on a job well done KD
That's what I love about women, we fight for what we believe in, we don't back down.
Let some one mess with our kids and we go for the juggler.
As for your Husband I don't think he meant any harm he was trying to be cute. I bet he thought he was giving you a compliment.
My husband would not get involved either, he would just sit back and let me fight the battle, he does not like conflict of any sort.
I'm so proud of you for not letting this go, so many people would have.
So, has your Son said anything else about it?
Peace
Hi TJ...
I should have known your husband would have not got involved...ha-ha...didn't you say we were married to the same guy? Only difference it seems is mine doesn't mind conflict that much as long as it gets HIM what HE wants.
My son hasn't said anything else about it. He just said he laughs we he see's his principle now, but tries to stay out of her sight. He also said he isn't going to that library for a long time unless he absolutely HAS to. He's pretty embarrassed over it. He's likes to be thought of as a tough boy, not a nerdy kid who's mom comes and fights his battles. That's what he's embarrassed about. I just told him, some day he'll understand why I did what I did. Those adults were trying to take away his rights, and being he was a kid, he couldn't fight them like another adult could. It was MY job.
Thanks for your kind words... you are so sweet!!!
Luv 2 U!
Well BS, I won't dare tell you what you expect to here. I will tell you the truth, only the truth, I hope you can deal with the truth, and it doesn't send you into a silent zone. That would make me very sad. :(
What has kept us together??? Well he thinks he's perfect...God'd gift to this world. hee- hee. He does love me, I know that. But he didn't learn how to share with his brothers very easily...and he still doesn't know how to share well in a family unit. So it causes problems. Like the post above...it didn't involve HIM personally so why should he bother wasting HIS precious time. Well I'm just the opposite. I share EVERYTHING to a fault. If I buy something for myself and love it, I have to give it to someone else just so they can love it too. My younger sister thinks I'm insane. If I love a purse, I will buy it, then give it to her, and keep my old one. Just because I feel like I can just go get a new one for myself any time, but I can't feel good about having something, if someone else doesn't have one too. I know, it's retarted, but that's just how I am. So I just know my husband is a good man, he really is, he's just selfish. And I'm not selfish, so we equal eachother out. He thinks I'm a pain in his ass because I keep giving people stuff, and I think he's a bigger pain in the ass for not helping people... so we are even. We don't not love eachother...we just get on eachother's nerves.
Believe me...if you were thinking I was going to say I'm staying with him for the sake of the kids, you are wrong. I would NEVER stay with a man for that reason. I think kids are better off in a home that is happy not a two parent home that is unhappy. So that is my answer to your question, Mr. Brainstormer. Are we still talking now?
First of all, have to stop calling me BS cuz it is just wrong!:P heh.
Second, OOOWWH!:(:) KD, you just continue to make yourself more beautiful in my eyes:) I don't think it is retarded at all what you do. It is wonderful and freeing. You are not so ruled by materialism but in fact somewhat generous about it. I suppose it could be crazy when I think of a guy who spends a fortune on a new video game system and then sells it off for half the price less than a year later. Claims he was bored with it. THAT is crazy because it is like a waste of money. So, maybe you are a little crazy?:P But, for some reason...it just seems so wonderful. And, hubby is just a child trapped in a man's body and refuses to let love from you in. I dont get it. Another couple that doesn't make sense...wait, didnt we go down this road in one of your first posts?:P Understanding men and what is missing in life?
For one person to be totally self-centered and the other not...and it never changes? It is as if love has no effect on the individuals. It is as if you put an orange next to a lead brick...there is no melding...no attempt for one to become at all like the other or find a happy medium. You cannot have a leaded orange:P
I just dont understand. But, there is no reason from that for me to stop speaking to you. You just keep turning me to mush:)
Ohhhwww...you Brainstormer, are the most sweetest guy!! You know, your complex personality has so many wonderful qualities. I knew from when you left your first comment on one of my first post, that you were a very interesting guy. I had my "feelings" about you. I since, have gotten to know you much better and discovered on of the most unique and special individuals I've ever had the pleasure of getting to know. You are MY FRIEND!! I do TRULY CARE ABOUT YOU!! and I will not call you BS anymore!! :) Hugs!
after ur further explanation in the response to brainstormer, i retract what i said... as i wrote it i thought perhaps there might be more to it...afterall, none of us were there to witness the tone of voice, body language, facial expression etc that may have been involved....u did tone it down in ur original post tho so i guess that's why i thought it rather harmless.
investor ehh? i work for a financial company...i'm the assistant to 7 people just like ur husband...i kno aaaallll about how they work!! haha much credit & luv to u KD!! ;0)
I never thought I would find a place to write you a note to say CONGRATS on the win for your son..I knew you could do it...
You are one Awesome MOM....
Hugs my friend.
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